I should consider today as one of the gloomy day I had. I felt terribly ill-hearted that I think I just say straight to her face, which I didn’t, of course.
Sometimes I had to imagine things I should have done (but I would regret it if I ever did so I did not do it) to calm myself. I usually diverted my feelings to surf around the internet, most probably blogs or YouTube or even watch some downloaded movies. Well, I guess it’s time for anime. So I watched Bleach Movie – Diamond Dust Rebellion. It was segoi (s-goi-e) means AMAZING! as Japanese puts it.
Okay. Enough with the introduction. Let’s get back to real deal now. The reason I acted out so pissed of, is because I cannot do thing the way I want it to. It’s not like a big thing but it had affected my way of finishing my assignment. The condition of my house, I currently stay in Malacca, is kind of bad with pests and it had affected me, personally and some other housemates. We cannot do work in fear. Plus, my problems with people keep adding up.
It’s hard to do things with heart swollen up, so I watched the movie. Towards the end of it, Kurosagi Ichigo said;
“As long as we’re alive, there are going to be times when we don’t agree with others, but you have to decide how you will let that affect your life”
So it struck me.
How bad the mood I have, I am the one who decide how it affect me. I should not let them (ones I had problems with) overpowered me. May be I’m the only one who felt so which means I have not affected them that very much. So why bother?
I decide my life, my reputation and my feelings. Huhu
It’s all in my control, my power. What’s beyond control is God’s will and fate.
Let me share with you 1 big problem my family and I encountered for the past 2 months.
(I thought of a short post but I guess it can’t be helped)
Well, refer to this post.
My family and I have been encountered by the Jinns and devils (syaitan) which caused problems to each and every members of my family. From my father to my amad (lil brother), all of us are infected with such a problem but the most prominent one is my sister, number 6 (no.6). she is 9 years and on 2nd of December 2008, she’s been struck with mysterious cases of all. Becoming all sorts of thing such as behavior of a tiger, snake and monkey. It is scary, you know, to watch you beloved sister becoming such and such and get hold of her who’s trying to kill herself. She said that she lost control of herself and she could not do anything about it. Even when she prayed, the thing pull and and push her and require us, the other siblings to hold her while she was praying.
This is beyond imagination. People who came to visit often did not believe until they saw with their own eyes; they hurriedly asked to excused themselves and we all just played plain understanding. It’s SCARY… we all have to bear with it.
Long story short, after spending thousands of money for cure, finally my sister managed to be herself again, which took approximately 2 months and a half with the ups and downs. she fainted, kicked and hit something and somebody whenever she lost control. Hurm.. it’s pretty much to absorb, right?
Whatever it is, we thank Allah for his love and mercy; that Allah don’t let the problems take control of the family’s affair (although it’s hard to get thru it)… but we managed to curb the problem slowly.
Just imagine, we are a big family of 8 siblings, plus parents, it becomes 10 heads of problems. Everybody suffered inside out and my parents suffered hideously; Hope they’ll be stronger and stronger.
Anyway, despite what people says of not to fight with the fate and just doa and pray to Allah; we decide to curb the problem with ‘ikhtiar’ (ways) thru Islamic ways; ones that rely on Allah with stronger and powerful use of Alquran, insyaAllah.
So, what I’m trying to say here is, no matter what happens, believe in yourself and Allah and other people who cares about you. Don’t let problems with anything affect your life badly. Be positive, insyaAllah, God shall brightens His love upon you.
Just remember what Kurosagi Ichigo said;
“As long as we’re alive, there are going to be times when we don’t agree with others, but you have to decide how you will let that affect your life”…
Have a wonderful life! Chaiyok!