<< InDAh >>

life is like a dream...

2011-03-17T01:13:00.007+08:00

gorgeous Merahjamboo with son, wafiy and me :D

I often heard people said "Life is like a roller coaster" and I only believed it when I saw my friends' lives developed and maturing, since mine is still monotonous and revolved within me only.

some of my friends are having their first child, some are still expecting, some are hoping and some are getting married. some are still new in courtship with some had already engaged. and some, a minority group just like me, are engaging ourselves with work and other stuff, depicting a healthy (sometimes very down under) single life ones could have. haha

yep. being single is hard, but being married and hoping for a child from that marriage is harder. my innocent and out of sensibility advice is, enjoy your coupling time and lets just ignore about others who does not give a damn about our hardship of life. the most important thing is, we double our efforts and pray to Allah, pray hard..

hurm... and the hardest one is of course, having to cope with a divorce. i cant say much about this, but from some of my friends who had been through this, they said nothing is easy and simple, and to let go is the hardest one, be it from hatred or just cant stand living together. yes, i know i have never been through these expecting child and divorce, but i can tell that it was not anyone wishes to be so.

i have to keep telling my stupid and forgetful side that i have to be thankful that i dont need to experience these cruelty of lives, when my heart is full with green envy when i see others' affectionate relationship. life and people always have ups and downs. some will experience ups first, then downs and vice verse. some even shared love-hate relationship which has ups and downs at a time in every moments of their lives. ughhh.. tough life!

and by being monotonous in upgrading relationship status, life would seems rather dull, as if my roller coaster ride has not started yet and i am afraid that i might fall due to the rust of the old equipments with perhaps, very little maintenance .. (oh now, i remembered the book written by Mitch Albom; the five people you met in heaven)..

or may be, may be, I am riding each of my friends' roller coasters without realising that I had lost mine.. is it possible?

ahh.. enough with the metaphor and symbolism.

the key point is, i have to decide what to do with my life and keep this as organised as possible since i had nothing to do now. hahaha.. no no no.. life is short. make it beautiful and learn the wonderful lessons from it by living it for the right purpose :D

i pray for Your Blessings. InsyaAllah ^__^

p/s : I like my own comment in Facebook, when my friend was pretty sad about people gossiping around questioning about her not having a baby yet. &^$26%%&*^^&%$@#%$0p!!!! here it goes ;" kalo di ikutkan org mmg xpernah sudah. kalo aku ni, blom kawen, pot pet pot pet. bla da kawen, nak anak pulak.. bila sorg, xcukup pulak.. org hye akan berhenti berckp bila diorg da mati.. takde pekdah nye kte nk amik port sgt.. hehehe... senang cite. mcm la kite hidup ni menumpang rezeki dia.. semua ni sementara... sementara saja.."

I'am afraid of my dreams

2011-02-08T22:46:00.006+08:00

dreams..

2011 brings a kind of maturity to my perspectives. seems like turning 26 will bring so much of life-changing feelings, hopefully for the better. my dreams circle around worldly affairs, these actually making me sad and nervous for I believed I was a kind of religious, and I still am, I hope!

okay, lets get to business.

1. I want to design my own home

this dream is rather impossible, for now, since i am nowhere near to design any home, what more my own. although i am not good at designing, but i know i like bali style with modern touch and a little garden around the house especially at the front yard and the side yard of the kitchen... :D anyway, if i get this opportunity, i would be elated to share it with my family and friends.. insyaAllah

2. I want to have a child?

OMG. the feeling of having my own child arose just after i met Iqbal a.k.a Busu during the CNY holidays for 4 days. in fact, i had my sweetest picture carrying sleeping him while i'm asleep. cute!! ^__^. i dont know how to describe but the craving to have a child somewhat resorted in my very heart. i know i am still single and have not any good chance of meeting mr.right-for-me in the moment yet. i never feel like this and i'm crying over it. i sensed how much i want to climb on the relationship stages, but my destiny was not in the same boat, at least, yet. this makes me scared to death, since i am afraid to get a heartbreak if, ever, i lose hope. and i hope not. insyaAllah..

a baby ... :D

p/s: may be this happens because i am surrounded by pregnant ladies including my sis-in-law, Puan Miez Mimosa, Mrs.King a.k.a JoJo, Puan Merahjamboo and delivered-already-lady, Mrs. Reenem and baby naura!! ehehe

3. i want to meet my mr.right. ready!

honestly, i have never get myself in any serious relationship, personally because i dont want one. i believe there are stages for relationship, starting from acquaintance, friends, special friends, and spouse.. well, i have not find one yet.. i hope i will meet and get close with him this year, insyaAllah.. :D.. (although i am so damn afraid if i .... )

4. i want to further my studies..

really, i really want to do this but time and space did not really allow me to. i hope the Hadiah offered by the Kementerian Pelajaran Malaysia in furthering studies will be available until 2013 because in the mean time, i will be able to complete my 3 years of working and scored at least 85% for Prestasi. So, i will be able to qualify myself to apply and work my self up to get that. insyaAllah... :D

and i hope i can share my dreams with my family especially my beloved parents, siblings, sisters-in-law and future spouse :D oh, i have a question to him; WHERE ARE YOU??

need to move

2010-10-19T14:53:00.004+08:00

Something had went wrong with my blog interface. I don't know how to fix it, or may be I might know it if i try to solve it, but I didn't.

so I am creating a new page, I hope you guys will stick to it too :D

www.nisanine.blogspot.com

or

you.make.me.smile

sickness is good though..

2010-08-09T15:57:00.002+08:00

Yes, when i was suffering of the some sickness back then, an ustaz told me a story. He said, it is good to have sickness, as a kafarah to the sins we've committed, with or without our knowledge. and also, he said that sickness He gave us, is to test us, to show that we are in the limelight of His Eyes, being watchful over us.. to test our love to Him and so many more. we just need to have some faith in His planning.

in my opinion, however, we need to also pray for being made at ease over things happened in our lives. we shall always habituate reciting 3 ayah at the end of Surah AlBaqarah, which can be summarised as a prayer to ease down the trials given to us as well as asking for forgiveness if we ever forget Him through His trials.

He, the ustaz, said that once, The Beloved Prophet Muhammad wanted to ask a lady for marriage. then, he was told that the lady was a very good lady and never had a sickness in her entire life. hearing that, The Beloved Prophet quits his intention. i want to highlight here, the important of being sick and in trouble. Allah is testing our love and patience, and being under His limelight, we are of good souls. we try to keep on surviving and keep on praying without fail. we increased our loves.

okay now, let's look at ones who doesnt have that sickness thingy. we kind of forget everything. we enjoyed ourselves to death. we eat, drink, sleep, and having fun. it is showed and portrayed in Syurga Cinta, in so many other movies. we can see the sinful acts we could be doing, if we were never tasted by Allah. so, be grateful of your condition of life, we might be from middle-class society, or perhaps, considered-poor community, but believe me, this world is going to end someday. DUNIA FANA. fana means tidak kekal, be grateful and try to increase your love towards Allah by praying at the beginning of time 5 times a day, pray in groups, pray in masjid and preferably, live in religion because Islam is the way of life. Do not separate what is should not.

as for month Ramadhan is coming, celebrate it and use it wisely. the world is dying and so do us. we may not see the next Ramadhan. so, fully utilise it.

hope this served as reminder for you and me. Allah Hafiz. remember; ALLAH always remembers you. He always loves you. so love him back. =)

complete me

2010-08-09T15:14:00.004+08:00

*gambar hiasan
yes. complete.

says a pakcik who helped to cure me. for my last session with him, I ought to do a 'mandi bunga' which should be performed by my mother, but the ayat and all is done by him. well, my mother help me took a bath, that special bath. and he said, after 45 days, i shall be a complete me.. as he said that before, I was scattered all around and my soul is weak. that's why I was prone to catch some bad spirits or some kind of troublesome and petty sickness. whatever it is, i asked for God's blessing, for my family and I safety and health. we try to find the cure, at least we tried our best.

complete me? hurm, he said my treatment shall be complete in 45 days. and today it is complete. my scattered-me shall be no longer. unification of soul. yes, unify. hurm.. i myself did not understand its connotation to what extend, but i just rely on God's planning. =)

and he also said something about my jodoh. i just couldnt recall. haha. as long as i am complete and by far, healthy and happy.. i have no regret! whoooot whoot!

I miss Mr.Em..

2010-07-08T18:20:00.007+08:00

when i reflect and re-read my previous entries, i felt a crazy feeling of living in Malacca.. the memories and everything about it was a total crave for me right now. As much as i hate to say this, after all the hardships i encountered and endured in Malacca, I MISS MALACCA. It makes me a woman. From a teenage girl who knew absolute nothing about life to a very justified and cool (perasaan je lebih) matured young lady.. :P

and there comes in Mr.Em - a friend indeed! he's there for my ups and downs. although sometimes he disappeared under the radar, he is still there for me. when my girl friends ditched me nowhere, he's there to back me up. when i was all alone, he's there to entertain me. when i needed some help, he's there to lend me his hand.

but now, after he broke ups with his girlfriend, he kind of deserted our friendship. he seems tired of me and my problems. (hey, I did share with him lots and lots of happy moments alright). I even went to his girlfriend's house and have dinner and what's not there. she is so carefree and flexible. It's just sad and pretty much hurting that their 3 or 4 or may be 5 years old relationship ended before any tie.

hurm, talking about my best guy friend, Mr. Em never exhausted of willingness to help. He now seems to change his course. He did not seem to even care about me no more. for years, we've been out and about every so often. Last year, my girls and I went for a movie. so i invited him to join us. he came and it was so cool of him since we're all 10 girls. haha. IT WAS HIS BIRTHDAY. that's how I celebrated it. hehe

and when I was ill, he came to the MALACCA Hospital. and also I went to MITC and I had a gastric attack. He came out of nowhere when i called him, like a superman did, and send me to a clinic. and also when we, MRs.King and I needed a ride to and from KB-MLK, he's ready to lend a seat in his yellow car. huuu.. it's a long ride and usually we stop by at his gf's house in Cheras. and there's one time when only me asked for his ride, i slept all the way from KB to MLK. i still remembered when we reached Kuala Krai at 5pm and he had to stop there to repair his car's alignments. and about 8pm, we ate Laksam i brought from home en route to Gua Musang. i still remember, at 10 i started to sleep and arrived Putrajaya at 12 midnight. i still asleep when he stopped by at his sister's. He knocked on the mirror, i opened the door, and continued to sleep until we reached Malacca (Jasin to be specific), at about 2am. He sent me to Aireen's, where Aireen and Alyaa were there waiting for me. owhh... i miss them sooo much!!

and also my birthday last year, after Alyaa and hubby brought me tour around Malacca Night Town (Bandar Hilir including a Taming Sari ride and Boat Tour), Mr. Em came to my Jasin's house to bring Alyaa and me to eat Asam Pedas near Hang Li Po Well at Bukit China.

and the memories went on and on..

huuu... our friendship will not shatter. although it would be tough, i will hold on tight. thanks for the memories. Hope we all will be under His Barakah and Guidance..

The proposal and 17 again

2010-07-06T17:32:00.005+08:00

Both these movies I watched with my girls, Jannah and Reena. It was like the moment I shall treasured most since my last movie watching last year. Memang tak sangka, even dah keje pun, kami masih lepak dan tinggal bersama. TESL rock!

Actually, I’ve watched The Proposal before, alone. And I did think that it was a pretty much Cinderella story which I quickly got up to reality, but for this time around, watching it again with my girls, it seems like a dream that I truly wish for it to come true. How stupid it may sound but the effect it got on me … huh! And Fuhh! Is speechless.

The hero, oh wow, thousands wishes wouldn’t be enough to wish for him. The character, the looks, the personality, the family and the love and passion.. they’re all perfecto! Too perfect I figured. But the quality for mr.right is so much about him. He is very committed to what he believes that makes him happy, he’s handsome and very good looking, he’s very humble and somewhat strong and dominant. His family is awesome! The family is wealthy but they do not act as one, and obviously supportive and understanding as well as welcoming. And about the love, I’m sorry, I cannot describe love because I never feel it. I do not know love.

For me, love is everything.. and about everything. I simply cannot put it into words. It pure and unique and it has ups and downs. Sometimes, we have to love again and again without fail with our spouse. We have to cherish each other everyday which we practically forget to do when we are already married. We forget to admire each other since we are comfortable of having him/her in our lives. We forgot to say ‘I love you’ or ‘I miss you’ every now and then because we are shy. But not before marriage! Before marriage, you feel that you want to show the world that you and him/her are in love. You’re proud lover. And after marriage, it all seems to be diminishing. Hurm, well, I may not know much, but this is what I saw…

adik ku kawen ngan kawan aku?? aku pulak??

2010-07-02T16:55:00.005+08:00

haa.. ini gambar tunggang terbalik. tapi terrrbaik punya. adik aku matekumerah dan stu_comot telah selamat diijabkabulkan on 13 June 2010's night. i was one of the eye-witness when my younger brother said the akad... hurm.. :D

and the poyoest couple on my brother's wedding chairs is Jojo and her hubby, happily married started on 10th June 2010.. both couples shared the gap of 3 days of the days they were married. i was one of the important figure on their days...huhu

and i kept asking.. when will i had the day too? i had nobody in my life. i had never in love. it saddened me some more when i heard a famous English saying said, "It is better to love and separated than not to love at all"...
ohh.. how i hope that saying is incorrect for me!.. please help me. help my confirmation bias! i mean, psychologically speaking, i'm asking people out there to disagree with the saying. it soothes me and do me good, for sure.

haha, seems to be out of control. sorry bro, for this time around, your sister's sanity to write is at the edge of being rocked. anyhow, you married one of my best friends. now i know, you made a right choice. she loves you dearly.. and i am proud of you too.

and for Mrs. Jojo who is now turning to be addressed as Mrs.King, i love you dearly. dont sweet escape me.. i'm afraid of drowning alone.. hopefully, be not drown but floated in love, trios of us. ehehe.. stu_comot, me and Mrs.King..

insyaAllah..

p/s: i will post a decent entry next time. now i'm having a numb nose due to thousands of bersin and i have a really sore-throat which makes me unable to even smile.. nor speak with joy!

running away ..

2010-06-15T16:51:00.004+08:00

i was hard for me to put details into words. it really was.
my life was rather complicated. my dreams could not yet be achieved; taking up master course, get married and be happy!

working life is so much different when i was studying. it turn me around like cream in food processor. and being 25 and single doesnt do me good. i dont have that enough strength to face and even avoid all my friends' sort of happiness. i am happy for them but when i reflected on me, i was afraid of dying alone. i dont want to be someone who stay alone for the rest of my life. believe me, turning 25 struck me hard in the face.

with all the questions and assumptions of me having nobody yet bothered me so much. the black thing grew inside of me, making me so damn sensitive to even a little remark about my crediblity would break me hard. my heart collapse, splashing into tiny drops of black glass. i was easily moved and tears would stream down like waterfall on my cheeks.

my self worth and self-esteem were like cracked eggs. it bleed not blood and it stink! in my heart.

i am always thinking of being envy for someelse's good being. ahh.. it would be so good to be able to go overseas, to UK, and all sorts of places with beautiful pictures, travel around, go to Mekah, with their family and love ones.

i'm jealous indeed, ... am i not thankful? i have great life, great family and friends, great job, and i'm still not happy..

i'm searching for the he who would bring my eternal love from God. where is he?

please, where are you?

thinking of these.. all these.. makes me feel like running away, leaving everything, release my soul and die alone.
Noooooo!! it wont solve the problem, but i want a way out. i'm stuck in me, i hate when i felt the jealousy.. i want to be happy.. and accept that everybody has their own lifepath and fortune..

heart... heart... hurt.. a lot..
cure me, save me.. love me.. dearly..

wow! 101 already?

2010-05-10T10:59:00.003+08:00

it has been months since i last updated my blog. and i just realised that i've reached 100 posts the previous one. and as for the 101, i want to share some stories of Ahmad and some snippets.

Ahmad

my youngest brother

his story should be written in Malay, so allow me.

"Akak, cuba teka, apakah contoh haiwan nocturnal?"..

" wor, advanced budak-budak sekarang punya vocabulary. aku tahu perkataan tu pun dalam 4 tahun lepas".. kata aku dalam hati.

"hurm, apa ek? Ahmad tahu?" ujar aku.

" kelawar"

"in english we called...bat. B.A.T, bat!." sambung aku

"oowhh.."

"amad, nocturnal tu gapo?" tanya ili (kakak ahmad darjah 5)

"nocturnal ni haiwan yang hidup pada malam hari dan tidur pada siang hari"..jawab ahmad dengan naive-nya

"haaa.. sama la ngan ramai budak-budak muda sekarang, nocturnal. hidup malam, tidur siang" tambah aku. "mu'allimah ajar ke ahmad? (Ahmad bersekolah SRI - SEK.REN.ISLAM)

"tak lah. amad tengok dalam 'My Friends, Tigger and Pooh'."

terkejut aku yang tengah drive tu. adoyaii.. tengok tv daaa..
haa, tengok, tv pun bagus sbenarnya, bukan saja improve children ability to use language properly, but also gain some input. and this is awesome!
memang la Amad jarang sangat tengok in English, but the Bahasa Melayu is okay too. somehow, it gives Ahmad the desire to write, and he has his own book of simple essay in Malay language.

owh. it's time now for my class. i'll update later.

batik

2010-03-27T10:09:00.002+08:00

JOM! jom singgah ke blog saya satu lagi..

valsaboutique

di sini saya akan menjual batik hasil tangan dari kelantan, gred A dan terbukti sangat berkualiti.. anda pasti teruja.. ianya mempesonakan..

hari sukaneka SK Laloh..

2010-03-13T11:37:00.002+08:00

iye. Sports Day at SK Laloh, Kuala Krai, Kelantan was held on 3rd March 2010. there are 4 Rumah Sukan competed. Miss Niya and I were assigned to represent the Blue Team called Laksamana... some of the people called our team as Laksa mana? (where is the Laksa?).. whatever they called us, we, the blue team won the Rumah Terbaik (The Best House Awards)..

it was a great experience, building the House with the pupils and also the other House Teachers especially Cikgu Azman Syah and also Ustaz Raimi. Miss Niya was so creative in designing the House and me, contributed to executed the plan we discussed and brainstormed earlier that week.

on the evening a day before the event's day, I went to the site where we should actually build our Blue House. for the disgrace of a Blue teammate, i could see nothing, even the pupils keep asking me where is the Blue house. empty. the assigned carpark was empty.

answering to the pupils questions, after surveying other team's Houses, I confidently said, " I'm going to do some magic, tomorrow, you will see our House."
the pupil replied, " You dont do magic", "You cant do it"... and I said, " You just dont know what I'm capable of".. hahaha.. so much of magic.

after that I went home and on the way back, I saw the pupil keep telling others that I am going to do magic. hahaha..

and the magic works. I used my car to brighten the night, we were up until near midnight. Some marching team pupils come and lend a hand. it was a night to remember. all the noise and also the merry pupils playing while working, it was so much fun and memorable experience.

these are some of the pictures taken on the day. I'll write the second part later. :D

ahhhh!

2010-02-06T12:14:00.003+08:00

heeeee haaaaaa

i feel like screaming..

i feel like laughing...

i want to go jungle trekking....

please please please

huhu >.<

mati itu pasti.. kubur macamane?

2010-01-29T02:01:00.008+08:00

Sedang aku melalui laluan sempit itu, aku terlihat petak-petak garis yang bersegi empat tepat, dicucuk kayu kuning merah sebagai penanda. Terus aku teringatkan benda yang sama di kawasan perkuburan di depan Bukit China di Melaka. cuma bezanya, di sana, kayu penanda dan benang putih digunakan.

Aku : weh, anis. aku nak pilih yang bawah pokok wei, nampak cam sejuk je kawasan Telipot ni. tapi tak tahu nak kaler mende, kuning ke merah? dua-dua aku suka..

Anis : pilih? weh sedara mara semo tanam kat Tumpat la.

Aku : taknak ah kubur kat Tumpat, panas. direct sunlight. sini ada pokok besar.

Anis: mung gilo! sama je kubur mana-mana. gilo! %@^%*@&Q^#WQ*^

Aku: ahahahaha. ye la weh. mase aku g Sibu last week, abg wan tu pusing 3 ke 4 kali dekat kedai coffin orang cina and christian. dia cakap, those coffins tu ada yang cost up to RM3k. and ada yang well-equiped with battery wired air conditioner.. sejuk and cool tuu.. yela.. nak queue nek atas langit, takut body panas duk tdo dalam coffin tu kan.. tp paling lama boleh tahan 2 hari. may be nak suh body adjust to the comfy yet narrow room tu kot. lepas 2 hari, pandai-pandai la nak mati.. :P

Anis: mengom!

Selang 3 minggu, dalam perjalanan balik dari Pantai Geting sebelah Pantai Sri Tujoh, Tumpat.

(Jangan tertipu, ni gambar hiasan. tapi kawasan perkuburan yang kat Geting tu hebat sangat, di lereng bukit kecil, bersebelahan tasik dan diseberang jalan, terus ada ombak menghempas pantai..)

Aku : Weh lok Mok, acu kelih kawasan sini ni, comey laa.. berangin molek. doh la dekat gilo nge pantai. pado kat Tumpat tu, panah ceng ceng.

Mok : sedak nih sinih. berangin, jolo doh. pah bakpo?

Aku : Ore nok kubur sini ah. comey, sejuk, berangin, pah boleh dengar ombak menghempas pantai. nampak tenang jahh..

Mok: ho la deh. mugo nati puah-puah (bosan) boleh lepak kat pantai deh?

Aku : ahahahaha. betul. best tuuu..

entah apa la yang dalam kepala otak aku ni.

apa-apa pun, semua nya terletak pada amal kita. banyakkan bertaubat dan berastaghfirullah. kalo kita ikhlas beramal dan elak kemungkaran, nescaya Alquran berupa bidadari/a yang bercahaya akan menemani kita yang seorang diri dalam tanah tu nanti sesampainya Hari Kebangkitan. Sesungguhnya, ingatlah.. mati itu pasti.

live your life wisely, and time wait for no man. kun fayakun.. tetapkan hati kepadaNya.

Pictures tell it all ~

2010-01-26T14:49:00.008+08:00

I was fasting yesterday. The reason I try myself to fast is to test my gastric problems and to adjust my diet.

For two days straight I went home from school later than any other teacher, well, not that late compare to those who are in the working world, at 3 to 4 p.m. and for two days straight the teachers’ sons and daughters were running here and there in the staff room, making it uncontrolled and very hectic. The previous day, they were calmed by a teacher, who loves to tease and tell stories to them. They were very eager and very good listeners. And, for the two days straight, I gave them the chance to watch movies from my small new laptop, well it’s a Dell and it’s my dad’s. =) they love to watch G-Force! And so do I. Then, I can do my work in peace.

I managed to capture some pictures with them, I did teach them during school hour. However, when it reaches the time (the bell rings), they and I change our roles, they are just children who love to laugh and me, an in-between adult, who love to work and watch movies including children’s. ahaha. I love kids, but with them, I too, demand respect. They can tease and play with me, but I draw a line, gap or whatever you call it, that some time drawbacks them from me. I want them to get near me, but somehow it seems I do not want to.

Whatever it is, let’s see those pictures of yesterday’s!

And today’s!

Look! there's an angel!.. probably cupid? hahaha

this is how I feel when I lose my temper with my Year 2!

and how i wish to disguise myself and go to Paris! ahaha

Aahahahahha. From those pictures you can see, today is a hectic day for me. As I am the teacher in-charge for this week, together with a male teacher, the cases keep growing from one to another. The very first morning, a mother came to the staff room, reporting her son had been bullied for 3 days straight. Searching for the root of the problem, Mr. Azman Syah and I brought the kid to his so-called bully. Investigation was done by Mr. Azman but from the rumors around I can sense, the ‘bully’ is not really a bully. He is a Year 6 pupil and the kid is from Year 1 who shares the same floor as the Year 6. The kid is a really naughty kid whom all teacher had been complaining about, and no doubt, the Year 6, playing the role of a big senior, asked him to get back to his class. He ran away and fall. I don’t sense any bully problem here. moreover, the kid used to step onto all the tables in his own class and drives his teachers crazy. Hahaha. He is sooooo adorable but yet a really troublemaker.

And then, a nextdoor teacher came to see me, saying that my pupils (I am a class teacher), had torn the books of her pupils while they’re gone. Year 5 pupils with such demeanour, urghhh, it really pissed me off and after I questioned them, the one who’s responsible is actually absent. Hurm.. what should I do about this?

And my year 2 pupils were so hyperactive, 38 head of mixed ability and attention vision/sight. I tried to attract them but their hyperactivity obstructed my lesson, I can only say only 60% of my objectives were achieved. 2 more weeks to exam! Argghh how I hate the washback effects! (google for more information about this).

And now I’m finding my mood to finish up my lesson plan as the PPD and Nazir persons are going to observe us, the teachers, teaching. Just now, they came and went back, without observing any of us. Alhamdulillah.

Oh, I gotta continue my work, see ya!.

depression.. memakan diri

2010-01-13T14:29:00.004+08:00

** update pantas yang mengarut

this is the second week of schooling. i dont feel any tension in this school, but somehow i feel that i am suffering a depression. everyday i must take paracetamol and everyday i felt sick. and sicker towards the end of the day. and then i caught asthma. somehow it choked me while i'm sleeping.

and it was yesterday, the last pair of paracetamol left for me. i remember i quickly run my fingers on the numbers and dialled my mom's. and she didnt pick up her phone. i was thinking to ask her of whether she spoke of me or so, and i was back at my bed, trying to sleep. i need to get some rest.

Before that moment of choking, about 1 hour before, my sister called when i was about to hit the bed from school. i remember talking to her saying, ''i was not myself, that i am so tired i really need a rest and i will call her later''.

and then the choking.

I went to bed that night around 1030 p.m after watching 'So you think you can dance" which I dont think so and the nighmare began.

this particular nightmare consists of vampires; things that i LOVE to see in movies ONLY, and the fact that they entered my dream scared me off!.. and when they are about to attack me and my family, the vampire called MALIKA (is it the name in Cucu Betong?) attacked them first, and we're saved.

It was a 300 movie setting where they only uses arrows to attack and conquer. I vividly remember when my family members were surrendering when they blurted off their arrows. they hit us and some of us are dead. I even said to my parents that I love them the most and we shall meet in heaven. and there i was, holding my youngest brother, who is a little younger than he is now. He is a mere corpe, his neck and air flows had been attacked severely. I held his body. and then, when we were asked to read the verses of bible and what not, my brother read out loud the Quranic verses. they were mad at him but I quickly asked my brother to read in his heart. then, they were being good with us, some of them said to me to bring my baby brother who is still alive, well, merely, to the hospital which is quite far. They asked me to say that he sprained his neck whatsoever.

and then I saw, my uncle who actually planned all this. He had said that it is dangerous for us, the family members to come here (somewhere on the way to some place)... but we insisted on going before the tragedy of attack happens. He betrayed all of us. He couldn't even do anything. He only said he warned us.

and then i woke up, it was 430 in the morning. and i tried to sleep again, to find the peace to the nightmare..i felt the sad air of leaving. and i still remember, 1 of my family members asked when I say, "it's okay, we shall met in heaven. have faith in God", he said " but you're not married yet?!" .. isk, that is not even a question at the moment of that kinda death... it's a war!
my answer? i said, it's okay. i'll get married in Heaven. insyaAllah. :D

well, it's my nightmare.
and i have to conclude, i'm suffering a depression and affected my eating habit. hurm, i know i'm stress over monetary problem, but at least 2 problems were solved. first is the Bank Islam Cheque Deposit thing and the other is about my PC motherboard. alhamdulillah.

now, i mean today, i must gather up power and spirit particles of my loss hope so that i can happily end this week. :D

Ya Allah.. permudahkanlah untuk ku, kedua ibubapaku, ahli keluargaku, guru-guruku, sahabat2ku, dan kaum muslimin dan muslimat yang bertaqwa kepadaMu. Lindungilah kami dari kejahatan diri kami sendiri dan musuh2 kami, mala petaka yang tidak diingini, azab kuburMu dan azab nerakaMu, ya Allah.
Selamatkanlah kami dari ganggungan Jin dan Syaitan dari luar dan dalam.. amin..

My Valedictory Speech, IIUM 25th Convocation

2010-01-07T18:45:00.004+08:00

VALEDICTORY SPEECH FOR SESSION 4, 25TH IIUM CONVOCATION, 2009.

Honourable Dato’ Saifuddin Abdullah, Deputy Minister, Ministry of Higher Education
And Honourable Datin Norlin Shamsul Bahri,
Honourable Prof. Dato’ Sri Dr. Syed Arabi Idid,
Rector of International Islamic University Malaysia
Honourable Prof. Dato’ Dr. Md Tahir Azhar,
Chairman of IIUM 25th Convocation
Honourable IIUM Majlis Members and Board of Governers,
IIUM Senate Members
Representatives of Institute of Higher Learning
Honourable Guests and Companies Representatives,
Staff and Graduands of 25th International Islamic University Malaysia Convocation
Members of Media / Ladies and Gentleman

Assalamu Alaykum wrt. wbk.
Selamat Datang, Ahlan wa Sahlan, Welcome to IIUM's 25th Convocation.

It is a pleasure for me to be here today, a day that does not mark the end, but rather the beginning - a commencement of another chapter in our lives. Fellow graduates, we shared the same memories of running down the hallways, the chaos of registration, late nights studying and rushing to classes. At this point, let us ponder upon how much this university has changed our lives.

Distinguished guests and Fellow graduates,
This year’s convocation theme, “The dynamic role of IIUM graduates in realizing IIUM’s vision and mission in facing global challenges”, made me think and ask myself, to what extent have we changed and improved our lives? And to what extent has this university helped us to incorporate the Islamic values in our lives; values to live by, and values to help us face the global challenges.

My answer to my first question, my dear friends, is that we should always be ready to learn and adapt ourselves to new challenges. And for my second question, my fellow friends, is that the university has succeeded in its vision to become a leading international centre of education which produces not only all rounder graduates, but also khalifahs of Allah who have sound Islamic values. Alhamdulillah, I believe that all of us have gone through some memorable experiences and life-lessons that have molded and groomed us to be the all rounder and capable graduates that we are today.

Fellow graduates, our university has truly opened up our eyes to realize Islam as the way of life, and as values to live by to help us face the challenges in the real world, the world of struggle and risks which are both uncertain and challenging.

Yang Berbahagia, please allow me to continue my speech in the Arabic.
(refer attachment)

Ladies and Gentlemen,
Some of us have already entered the working world and work as accountants, nurses or teachers. And for us who graduated from the Institute of Education, were posted to rural schools all over Malaysia including Sabah and Sarawak to become the disseminators of knowledge. I am proud to say that, we are all the IIUM’s ambassadors. I hope we can utilize our knowledge learnt in IIUM for the betterment of the ummah; the hectic lives and the risks ahead will not become the hurdles to achieve a great life.

Fellow Graduates,
I would like to thank the Bahagian Pendidikan Guru, Institut Perguruan Perempuan Melayu Melaka, and the Institute of Education, IIUM for giving me and my fellow friends the opportunity to undergo the TESL Twinning programme. The few years in this university brought about everything we wanted in life. We learnt so much and craved for more. It was great to know and make friends with people from all walks of life and we enjoyed every program held. We missed dearly the lectures and interaction with the staff of this university. Our experience in IIUM brought out the best in us. We are the proud graduates of IIUM.

Ladies and Gentlemen,
In this dignified hall, there are two special people to whom I owe my thanks and gratitude. If it were not for them, I probably would not be here giving this speech. The two are my parents. Encik Mohamad Yusoff Mat and Puan Maznah Ibrahim. They are the ones who insisted that I join this university. I was very reluctant to become a teacher, but they were very sure and confident that I can become a good teacher and contribute to society by teaching. And now, I’m glad that I listened to their advice.

My father, Encik Mohamad Yusoff, who quit school early, once studied by himself by borrowing books from friends, and with only that, he managed to obtain good grades for the SPM. He proved to me that, learning never stops and age is not a barrier to education. Seek knowledge from the cradle to the grave. I will always admire his motivation and conviction.
My mother, Puan Maznah, provided me with tenderness and love. She taught me about sincerity. Her life experiences had also taught me about the hardships, and that the world can sometimes be cruel. She always motivates me to be stronger and to never give up. She has always said that Allah knows what is best for us. So, never ever give up hope.

Therefore, to be able to face the challenges, I shall push myself to the limit and realize my own potentials as khalifah. Truly, parents are the khalifahs entrusted by Allah to guide and teach their children. I want my future students and children to see me as I see my parents Thank you Allah for my mother and father. Terima kasih ayah, mak. Kasihmu ku junjung hingga akhir hayat ku. Dikaulah ratu hatiku.

Fellow graduates,
We also should not forget to thank our amazing lecturers; all of whom have worked so hard to help us become top-notch students. They have helped us during our ups and downs in these few years of studying. Thank you for your time and effort in nurturing us and in giving us the best education.

Finally, we must not forget our fellow friends who have accompanied us all these years; those who would wait for us in times of desperation and those who would be there for us when we needed support. We will miss their laughter and their silly jokes. Thank you friends for being the marvelous comrades during those years. And thank you all … for making IIUM a truly unique university.

Fellow graduates, I conclude my speech with a pantun in Bahasa Melayu,

Seantero dunia kita berkawan,
Menuntut ilmu tidak berakhiran,
Sama-samalah kita berilmu pengetahuan,
Semoga berjaya wahai graduan.

Thank you.

Wassalamualaikum warahmatullahiwabarakatuh

p/s: I do not enclose my arabic text in here.. may be later.. :D

ini cerita amad ^__^

2009-12-05T13:03:00.003+08:00

Ahmad.. or (lebih mesra di kenali sebagai Amad)
Suka sangat tengok kartun..
Ye lah. Kakak dan abang borek,
Adik rintik.
Haha
(bukan ini yang aku nak ceritalah)

Amad,
Suka sangat berpantun,
gara-gara asyik sangat menonton Upin dan Ipin.
Tapi Upin dan Ipin tidaklah menjadi tumpuan utama Amad,
Kerana dia lebih gemarkan pengembaraan Benjamin Tennison,
Atau lebih dikenali sebagai Ben Sepuluh (Ben 10)
Hehe

Kes 1 : Pantun

Suatu hari, Amad bersuara;

Buah Cempedak di Luar Pagar,
Tak ada pokok, sila tumbuhkan,

(dia sambung lagi)

Saya budak baru belajar,
Saya berak dalam seluar.

Hahah
Habis satu keluarga gelak.
Iyalah, siapa sangka Amad akan berpantun secara tiba-tiba

Kes 2 : Debat lah pula…

Suatu pagi Khamis yang hening, diiring rintipan kasih sang langit lantaran kerinduan pada pancaran cinta sang mentari yang tidak kunjung tiba…Amad tersedar dari tidur.

Malam itu, kami berpelukan. Haha. Amad dimarahi ibu, dan mendakwa dihalau keluar dari bilik ibu untuk tidur di bilik aku.

“Amad bo tido bilik mok. Gi nuh tido nge kakak!!” ajuk Amad tentang bagaimana ibuku ‘menghalaunya’ keluar.

“tapi Amad sokmo tido peluk mok. Sedak kak peluk mok…”

Apa-apa saja lah Amad. Kami bukan berpelukan. Haha. Aku memberi sebelah tangan aku untuk dia peluk sehinggalah dia tertidur. kasihan sungguh si Amad ni.

Pukul 4 pagi… Amad tidak senang duduk, maksud aku, tidak senang tidur. Dia asyik terjaga. Aku dengan rasa kasihan menyarankan Amad untuk pergi ke bilik ibu.

“Malah ah. Mok halau Amad”, rajuk Amad. Lalu dia sambung tidur yang berposisi entah apa-apa.

Pagi itu, berbalik pada scenario iringan hujan, Amad terus berkata-kata apabila aku bingkas bangun untuk menyeterika baju kerja ibuku.

“Kak, mok kijo pulok ko hari ni” (walhal mak aku dah cuti sehinggalah hari Khamis atau Rabu, aku lupa)

“Ho lah. Mok kijo”, balas aku.
“Mok tu kijo hari-hari balik lewat.. berapo gak gaji mok nyoh bule bule (setiap bulan) ? Kalu Amad kijo natih, Amad nok gaji 3 ribu sbule.”

Mak aku pun jawab. “ hamboih.. nak makan gapo gaji 3ribu sbuley kalu kijo seksok gak? Pasir?”

Hahahah. Kami semua senyum bahagia diikuti gelak sakan apabila Amad yang bermuka yakin (confident) terpinga-pinga.

Apa lah Amad, baru darjah satu, dah fikir tentang gaji. Enjoy your time being a kid, kiddo! Nasib baik dia tak pernah tanya berapa gaji aku. hahahaha

it is a charm, i bet. ^-^

2009-11-26T10:43:00.002+08:00

It was like tonnes of words and topics hammered my head in these couple of days. I was terribly insane out here, doing the thinking on things I bothered which sometimes I should just ignore them.

Dwelling on and on.. on those things, I think I have got to make a list so that I will not turn into a psychopath. Haha.

I still remember the night I waited so long for the bus from Kuantan to arrive and fetch me and jojo at the Hentian Kuala Terengganu. It was 2 nights ago and we were waiting until 12 midnight for it to come. When it arrived, the bus driver was shocked to know that we were waiting for the bus and he shockingly asked us where did we buy the ticket. Of course we bought at the Transnational Ticket Counter back in Langgar, Kota Bharu. Ergh! Anyhow, thank god those seats were still left empty, and the other bus driver innocently said, “here the empty seat”.. daaaa, it's ours. Of course we will sit on it. Haha... I seem like a girl with a total madness, aite? Nahh.. we dont really give a damn on what happened at that moment because we were pretty much tired of waiting.. 1 hour and a half in the cold dark night was not a pleasant moment to cherish on.

Speaking of waiting, we discussed what would appear on tomorrow's newspaper if we died. Haha. It should be “two chicks died of bored”..or “dua gadis mati kebosanan”.. haha.. we liked it. Terlalu bosan hingga membawa kepada kematian. Too bored that caused us to die. How ridiculous and very, very insane talk.

While waiting earlier, at that time we hang out at McD's, spekmataku, jojo a.k.a shumuera and I were in very deep conversation on how we perceived people.

Indah: you know what, if I were given a piece of paper with a question; “why do you like him/her? State your reason” for example, I cannot even answer that. Because I like/love you for u. what else should be the reason? If I said, I love you because you wear good clothes, does it means I don't when you were not wearing one?

Spekmataku: well, it's pretty much of how you look in the people. The reason why on earth you come to like this person. You cannot just like him. You will need to see the things he did hat what makes he is. It's the reason that makes you look deeper into that person. The way he walks, he talks, he replies and the way he carries himself. It count.

Indah: well, I agree with you. No doubt we should not abandon those particulars, but to state those reasons as the fundamental core of why I like him, is not quite alright. Those reasons should be calculated in and somehow, they make him. I still couldnt put forward the reason to love or to like or even to be friend with someone. Perhaps, I did reason it out but I come to look at him as one; himself.

Spekmataku: yeap. Sure you are. But mostly, it is sure good when someone says something about you. It showed that he cares, he put you as the major topic to think of. Everything you do did mean something in your relationship. You, as a whole.

Shuumuera: well, it seems you two shared a really interesting idea here. Hehe. So, indah I think you should find someone who you can rely on because you're fragile alright. You need a man who is matured enough to carry your relationship.

Indah: I bet it is. I am so tired to put a strong face. To take a lead and to appear superb; well, I am not that good I guess. I am really tired of putting that strong face, as if I need to do everything on my own, as if I dont need no one to rely on. Oh god, am I sick? Hahaha

shuuemura : haha. Nahh. You're cool, alright. You're great, I know. So, what about your criteria for your perfect match, spekmataku?

Indah: yeah. I bet someone who can complete you?

Spekmataku: hurm.. I .. well,... I cant find the word yet.. hurm..

(silence)

Spekmataku : I want and I bet I need to find someone who can complete …. or who can end my words. Who wants to understand me and who can understand me. I'm tired of trying to understand him but did not get that from him.

Indah: well, may be you havent tried enough?

Spekmataku: I have. I think I had. Hurm.. but seriously I looked for a guy who is willing to understand me, who will be able to share and talk on the same topic, at the same level of understanding. The guy who eventually be able to end my word. …

Indah: well, insyaAllah. You're right when you say so since you are very good listener. And when you started to talk, you also need a soulmate/friend to do the same to you also..

*******************************************************

okay that's all for today.. InsyaAllah, things will be easier and better for us and you. I wrote this because I think I should share it with the world on the things we girls dwell on, which are not only some stupid and naïve gossips around the clock. Hehe ^__^

aku mimpi lagi..

2009-11-20T00:01:00.006+08:00

dah banyak kali aku mimpikan serangga.. atau lebih tepat, labah-labah
and it is not good ones. i was annoyed and threatened by their presents, they are everywhere near me, that makes me hard to walk pass the place i was standing. it was very 'seriau' or eerie..

they keep bugging me. i dont know why but when i come to think of it, i was rather disturbed by the feelings during the post-dream. i seldom remember my dream, like before, i dreamt about snake. only after 4 years i realised i have been dreaming for, only to grow in number, the same thing; snake!~i know this is when i go for the treatment, it was sihir and everything.

and now, the bugs are bugging me. it doesnt drive me crazy but i would really like to know about it. just wondering the hint/sign in it. hope Allah protects me from syirik/kufur. insyaAllah

here some of the meanings the net gave me:

Dream Interpretation Spider

The spider is a symbol of poisonous and sinful desires, on one hand, and an emblem of skilful and creative attitudes, on the other hand. If you dream of a spider, you'd better be honest and work hard in order to be happy and successful. To dream of a spider sitting on your skin: you need to be ready to fight provocation and worries. Sometimes a spider represents female seduction which "devours" of the male, in this case reconsider your behaviour, it may look patronizing, overprotective or demanding.

Tafsir mimpi tentang binatang

98. Mimpi melihat labah-labah
Nasib anda sangat diragukan.
99. Mimpi membersihkan sarang labah-labah
Persahabatan akan retak.
100. Mimpi melihat sarang labah labah
Jagalah perasaan anda dalam menghadapi musuh/lawan

**i'm not sure about seeing the web, but the spiders is everywhere.. and i was so afraid..

and this is what i found in ibnu sirin page, it was rather positive, but it showed that it is as how the western believe.

LABAH-LABAH *menurut Barat:

Labah-labah: Melihat labah-labah bermakna anda akan berhati-hati, bekerja dengan rajin dan menemui sukses. Labah-labah yang besar bermakna sukses yang cepat.
Tapi kalau anda dikejar atau digigit labah-labah tersebut bermakna masalah atau kesukaran dengan kejayaan tersebut.

hurm.. all in all, i pray to The LOVE, Allah who knows everything as He is the ONLY Creator and God for all. insyaAllah.

dear love..

2009-11-18T00:35:00.004+08:00

dear love,

my heart is craving for you.
you sounds so pure,
so admirable, so fresh.
you shall give the spirit to my soul to live on.

dear love,

you come in a variety of range.
and now my heart is dying for the soulmate's.
i need to find the one whom can complete me,
one who owns you
and is willing to share you with me.

dear love,

i am looking for you everywhere,
but i had never found you yet.
perhaps, i did not look hard enough,
may be, i am not searching for you,
at the right time, at the right place
and for the right person.

right that does not mean perfect,
but one who can accept me as who i am,
me who has more weaknesses than strength,
and is ready to explore
for the mystery ahead with me..

hurm..
perhaps i should pray more to Allah,
to grant these love wishes..

and perhaps,
i just need to keep on trying..

^_^

p/s: i'm attending the First Steps Teaching English course in Pengkalan Chepa. and there was a man that caught my eyes, but he shows no interest in me. ehehe. sometimes i do feel that i should not aim for him,but some parts of me, being so optimistic, urge me to try to hit on him.

haha. but really, i'm not really into him. he just not a hit. not for me because i think he's already has someone. takkan la xde org lg. huhu..

well, actually,he is not really my taste. hate the part that says, "why not", "at least you try".. because i dont know my taste. fair and has beautiful hands. and has good personality and character. that's it. haha. i may be am bold and loud, but i dare not hit on somebody. i am afraid of the rejection. like any other girls would feel. huhu

TESLians' Convo - Topic 1

2009-10-31T08:30:00.000+08:00

This years ‘ IIUM 25th convocation, the silver jubilee, marked the end of our studying years as undergraduates. We never think that it would be so fast, 6 years together, 50 of us, we never get bored with one and another.

And for me, the wonderful memories spent together can never be forgotten and will always be cherished. I can see myself changed, personality wise and of course, physically. Hehe. Well, I was pretty much of a rebellion back then. If there’s something wrong, I would blatantly speak out my mind without hesitation, without considering how people would feel or react to my action. Sometimes, I did regret for what I do and end up crying on and on without realizing why. I just felt like crying. I was unable to see or understand myself… but now I know why… because I don’t love myself. Back then, I felt that people should appreciate and love me… but I forgot to love myself.

Not only friends, my lecturers also did notice my misbehaviors. After I played the role of Project Manager for TCW- Tesl Community Weekend, (the Intervarsity Theatre Competition which comprises our girls’ brain and action to come out with several activities besides theatre) only then, I can see Allah tested me with my patience. I was condemned so hard by all of my friends although the programme was a success. Most of them never had the experience of how a programme runs and cannot bear with my style of leadership. Well, I cannot say I am a leader type but more of a consultant. I was so down that I taught of quitting my TESL studies. My parents also suggest so, well, sarcastically. Of course my rational and my parents sarcasm of me being low self esteem and motivation failure turns me on, to react the other way around, to give me a magic strength to be redha of what happened.

Thank god, Dr. Ariffin Mamat and all representative lecturers from other university praised me for what I had come out and done. He, personally, asked me to train our junior to held such a programme. The TCW programme was still a success until now, Dr. Suhaila is still proud of it. Its nature and its cooperation it brought us apart and closer in the same time. TCW is a magical programme that brought into the magical experience.

Talking about patience, it sure had changed me a lot. And sometimes I felt so lazy to argue on things that are not necessary to fight for. It also taught me about sacrifice; not blindly sacrifice what I am and what I had, but rather on being reasonable and considerate. And yes, I learnt how to think of others, as the same as I think of me. Patience increases my rationale and empathy. Thanks Allah for the challenges. You made me become stronger each day, insyaAllah. ^__^

sudah lama tidak update

2009-10-18T08:00:00.002+08:00

di sini, aku saje mau letak the senarai semak untuk aku refer.
ye la.. aku perlu update
tahun ini merupakan tahun yang sibuk dan membawaku kpd perubahan yang agak besar..

1. practicum ends
2. mula keje
3. masalah kuaters
4. puasa + raya
5. konvo.. yey!
6. makan pompuan? jadi rutin?

okehh.. t aku cte ek.. hehe.. sibuk pye pasal..
ni nk kne bawak adik aku makan roti cotek.. kalo nk tau apa itu roti cotek, meh datang kelantan. hihi ^___^

salam..

ahhh.. hati ku remuk!

2009-09-16T17:48:00.003+08:00

have a look at these lyrics. and listen to the song.
perhaps u can sing along to this song.

i feel kinda down today. i'll wite much more later.
hope u guys enjoy the song..
it's the best indicator of how i feel right now.

p/s: thx AE for the song~~ i'm really down..

aku di SK Laloh, Kuala Krai

2009-08-19T11:00:00.002+08:00

ini adalah update pantas kerana aku ada kelas pukul 11.15...

aku rasa sangat best dan senang di sekolah ini, cuma sedih kerana jauh dari rumah. bila dipikir2 balik, aku seharusnya bersyukur kerana ramai lagi kawan2 aku nun di sabah yang sangatlah berjauhan dari rumah dan mengajar di negeri orang semestinya. kali ini, giliran anak2 johor di hantar ke Sabah dan seorang terpisah ke Sarawak di atas sebab mengikut suami. dikatakan mengikut suami, tapi tetap di tempatkan di kawasan yang amat jauh, ye lah.. Sarawak kan luas..

hurm..

aku di sini sebagai seorang guru english. orang kata, first posting, supposedly mengajar dalam 3 to 5 years in the same school. believe me, mengajar itu Okay sebab anak2 didik semuanya berpotensi dan minta dalam pelajaran, tapi kes aku kena duduk kuaters yang bercampur2 dan ramai ... menggusarkan aku. tapi aku syukur, stakat ni, semua housemates boleh dibawa berbincang dan agak bersatu pendapat. setakat ni lah..

hihi..

kay..
nanti ticer nisa update lagi. dari tadi cari wireless, dekat bilik guru tak dapat tapi bila aku try di pejabat sambil fotostat, dapat pulak. hihi. alhamdulillah.. ada juga wireless free. tapi tulah.. bila update, aku type guna bahasa melayu.. hehehe... tu lah.. nasib baik tak guna bahasa kelantan. hurmm...

hari tu ada seorang budak cakap, ticer cakap bahasa bandar.. wkakaka.. ye la, bila mengajar, aku guna bahasa melayu standard together with English, because pupils here did not even understand a simple command.. like turn on the fan and the lights unless I pointed to the fan and lights.

hurmm....
kay lah. it's almost time. daaaaaaaa ^_____^

sedikit update..

2009-07-16T16:22:00.006+08:00

ini cerita amad. iye. adik aku yang sudah berumur 7 tahun. tapi penuh magik. haha

cerita 1

dialog bersama amad semasa my mom sedang membakar ikan.

amad : nok buh lalat dalam api ni mok..
ejak: amad! lalat tu cemar tu ...
amad : basuh doh..

huhu. lalat tu dah siap basuh sebab lalat tu kotor. ape daaa...

cerita 2

dialog semasa di klinik

aku : amad nok wak gapo kertas-kertas tu?
amad : amad ado rancangan. nati tengok la

amad lipat 4 keping kertas ke dalam kedua-dua belah poket seluarnya secara berpasangan..
sesampai di rumah..

aku: amad, mano ketas hok amad ado rancangan sakni?
amad: uhh.. tok jadi rancangan takdi. nok keno cari idea lain.

fuhh
tak tahan vocab budak ni.

..::update pantas ::..

date : 10 july 2009

subejct : English

time: 1105 - 1205 noon

venue : 5 Arif, SK Jasin, Melaka

for this last period, I used the time to do a language game with my pupils. we used 2 soft and big dices. when the dices were thrown and counted, the person who got the counting numbers (B) needed to describe about the person who threw the dices (A). They needed to make correct sentences and must only tell the truth. if their sentences were wrong, they needed to make new ones. haha. we had great fun! absolutely...

hurm.. and the time went by. I signalled the monitor to ask the others to stand up, marking the end of the period. then, the monitor called, THANK YOU, TEACHER!. When i was about to get out of the class, they made my heart sank. they shocked by by singing the LASKAR PELANGI song i posted before.

Guruku tersayang... guru tercinta..

i dont know how to react. whether to cry.. or to sing along. both seems unpractical. so, i smiled. big long smile and for sure deep inside, i HEART them.. hehe. they are so ROMANTIC and i LOVE SURPRISES. no need to presents or so, just a simple silent gesture of LOVE, APPRECIATION and RESPECT will do. They're the best!

so much so, they are all surprised when i said that i am from Kelantan. they said i dont sound like one! haha. heyy.. i'm a proud kelantanese.. ^_^

hurm.. furthermore, I received the news that i was posted to my homestate, Kelantan. hopefully, i'll get near or at my hometown's primary school. insyaALLAh.

owh, by the way, i am planning to hit Kuantan again or perhaps the Pengkalan Balok for camping this weekend. i really need the soothing sound of waves and beach serenity. anyone want to join? i'll be going with my brother, ejak and will be meeting my two friends in Kuantan. hehe..

ok. i gotta go. i need to go to TESCO now and fetch my Amad at school. ^-^

my best buffday wishes...

2009-07-05T23:33:00.005+08:00

1.
happy bestest day, indah.

hope your dream will come true

and you'll find your soulmate soon
;-)
from : spekmataku, 26 April 2008

2.
Epi besday kamu.may God grant all your wishes.
be happy owez.
da 24, tamo tdey2 k.
wuv u.
from : kerepekcomott, 26 April 2009

3.
wishing you the best of life and moment throughout your life,
May Allah bless and
cepat2 dapat jodoh
ameen
happy 24th buffday and
welcome to the club iye.
from: spekmataku, 26 April 2009

4.
Happy Birthday sa :-)
Bilo nak ado bf?
umur makin naik kna nikohs dohs join yaa
:-)
from: tengku ezulia (my princess) 26 April 2009

my comment:

insyaAllah.
i can never lose hope
may your prayers be heard
and mine too
;-)

luv you

listen to this nickelback track,
the lyrics poached my heart.
thanks spekmataku for the dedication
i really enjoyed it
\(^__^)v

GOTTA BE SOMEBODY
s.o.m.e.d.a.y

rumah di perantauan..

2009-06-03T22:58:00.004+08:00

The holidays.. this 2 weeks school holidays are giving me opportunities to spend time with my family back in my hometown, Kota Bharu, Kelantan.

i hardly heard nowadays that people talk backs about kelate anymore, there's not much prejudice and biasness no more, in fact lots of people are eager to come and visit Kelate. and ahh.. my trip back to my home from Malacca was sure hectic. There were too many accidents which included 2 upsidedown cars in separate occasions. I was so shocked seeing that. my heart is already at home at that time, so my mind was only thinking of how to get my body and things home. and before I knew it, i was already at home. hehe.. heeeppppiiiii..

so much so, my father is sick. Last time he got heart problem and now, the lung. He tends to suffoccate whenever he tried to lie and sleep. he had to sleep face down posture with higher pillow and i had to massage his back and legs until he fall asleep everyday. owh. How i pray for him to get better. 3 days passed and my father was getting better.

so, this morning, my parents' plan to take a vacation in Jogjakarta was on. so i send them to the airport. and they take their flight to KL and about 530 p.m, they messaged my sister saying they have reached Jogjakarta safely. Alhamdulillah.

as for me, i took my siblings back to the Kampung so that they can play with other cousins. they enjoyed so much of their times that Ahmad asked to get back home at Maghrib. erk.. akak tak biasa drive malam... lagipun ..hari nak hujan..

yesterday, i had brought Ili Aisyah and Ahmad to the beach, Pantai Cahaya Bulan.. at noon. haha. well, i got concrete and logic reason for them to not to go near the water and play under direct sunlight so much .... it's HOT. yerp, yesterday was a hot day in KB. and today's evening, it's raining cats and dogs.

well, for tomorrow, i aint got no particular plan. i dont know if i was able to fast or not, but one thing fore sure, i got a wedding to attend on 6th. it's my best classmate since F2, that means about 10 years back. hoho..

i got a lot of pointless things to say, but mt father's lappy wont survive long. so, before this entry could not be published due to the terminal and fatal energy error (battery low da ni), i should stop.

so much so, insyaAllah this friday i'll be Tumpat, for breakfast. hehe =)

p/s: soalan untuk jodohku tidak pernah pudar dibenak ini... siapakah kamu? di manakah kamu?

..:: introducing.. my lovely students... hihi ::..

2009-05-28T14:22:00.008+08:00

Tuesday, 26th May 2009...

on Monday, my pupils still have exams. so, today, I want to make a free lesson, meaning that they shall enjoy performing arts instead of drilling on paper. So, I asked them to choose a story and then act it out.. within 1 hour, they managed to perform their dramas interestingly. We had a great time that day! yeay~~

my lovely darlings.. 5 Arif

nice to see, nice to hold..
pretty hard to control!
very active and loud pupils!
naughty larr....hihi

they are performing their drama..

the smallest child is the Elephant, using his tie as the trunk.. hihi

the farmer and his children.. heee :D

let's jump, guys!!

one more time teacherrr~~
erk.. this is library la. aiyo...

I love the fact that you guys enjoyed my class..
let's make our learning fun and memorable~~

these are their performance clips..
kindly watch if you guys have time
hihi

click on the picture for larger view.tq
enjoice!

******************************
msg to ae_

,_ea ot
..yako, dlo tey ton ma I
...era uoy naht regnuoy yaw neve am I
..ahahaha .. selej ngj..

..nak al eerf ylerus si kaynim kisan
..ttok rayab enk nup newak siljam nakkat
...ut kalup gnecmak nawak
..ey 2laham nad 2raseb gnay haidah kawab ..ijnaj
(:...ehehehe

hepi buffday to kiera ~~

2009-05-20T21:18:00.006+08:00

i would like to dedicate a song to miss kiera..
this song was introduced to me by Mr.amin..
he insisted that this is a GREAT song..

well..
it's the greatest stuff for this moment
very simple yet fulfilling song..
hehe

it's a story.. and a song
you rock, dude!!

so, miss kiera, keep rocking the world..
you got the hands of a teacher..
make full use of it..
make a difference!

happy birthday..
as i said before,
whatever number you may come across,
you still rock!!
and make the life worth living~~

mmuach!

..:: enjoy the song ::..

kan best...

2009-05-19T22:54:00.003+08:00

kan best..

if there is a human called man's love to cherish

kan best..

if there is someone to care about and be cared of

kan best..

if there is someone to love and be loved

kan best..

if there is someone I need and be needed of

kan best..

if there is someone who understands me..

kan best..

if there is someone who is willing to accept me in his life and me to accept him...

kan best..

if there is someone who accept me as who I am and respect me for who I am..

kan best..

if there is someone to share my feelings with.. and me to share his..

kan best..

if there is someone to share my ups and downs with..

kan best..

if there is someone I cannot live without and so does for him..

kan best..

if my true love comes at this moment and forever..

kan best..

if that someone says to me...

"I miss you so much.."

kan best...kan?

..:: indah selamanya ::..

hadiah seyy updated

2009-05-18T14:58:00.005+08:00

hehe.. da lama sangat tak update pasal skola. hari ni, most of the Malaccan Schools celebrated Teachers' day.. huhu.. and when there's teachers' day, there's presents from pupils. for sure, I dont expect anything from the pupils, but still there were for me.. huhu.. tenkiu very much.. smoga kamu diberkati.. dan belajar rajin-rajin.. semoga berjaya dunia akhirat :)

ini la antara hadiah yang aku dapat.. comey2 jer.. huhu

ni bila aku da unwrapped sume2 itu.. comeyy.. ske bangat.. arigato gozaimasu!!

ni pulak hadiah belated buffday, from adik aku, anis; the clutch and from lovely fira, the sandals import dari Bandung..hehe. thanks you guys.. you guys rock my world~~! heeeeee :D

hadiah.. hadiah.. . hadiahh.. slurrppp :)
click on the pictures for larger views..

trip to Quantan.. pengubat hati..

2009-05-06T18:06:00.003+08:00

last weekend, my family, my friends and I (ayat skema gaya budak2 kelas aku) went to Kuantan for release tension. haha. ok ok. we came under unexpected plan. ad hoc one; all of us end up spending time in Kuantan. it's fun and i really enjoyed the time.

let's have fun with family and friends!! yeeehhaaa... it's almost maghrib and we 're still at the teluk cempedak.. waiting for the cempedak to fall on our laps. haha.. (bak pungguk rindukan bulan jatuh ke riba).. okeh? owh, i forgot to introduce, that my brother, ejak and my friend, sushi_me.

see, i told you.. it's the moon. haha.. just kidding. it's just some bubbles reflection up above the camera.

and this is the 3 musketeers.. dulu la. now appeared in various sizes and shape, especially me. haha

like usual, my little brother who's way taller than me, loves to manja2 wif me. adehh..macamane la dia nak dapat abang ipar kalo asyik duk berkepit memanjang. sampai ade yang bertanya, kapel ke? adehh.. dan yang tau dia tu adik, asked if he's the bongsu-est.. dia ade 5 lagi adik kat bawah tuu.. haha

tengok la kalo tak caye. this is the moment when he greeted me. haha.. ok gak. rasa la special sket. ^-^ love you always.

p/s: kenapa aku perlu pengubat hati??

.:: Laskar Pelangi ::.

2009-04-27T19:58:00.007+08:00

i just watched that movie on youtube.com uploaded by jaguarlampung43.
it has 12 slots and the storyline is so unique and subtle.

i'm touched terribly by the movie. it's very refreshing and inspirational. it made me think and realise to be thankful to God for giving me opportunity to learn. yes, everybody has the right to learn. to have such motivation towards learning is so inspirational.

it gave the idea of "dare to dream" since we were given such opportunity and to realise our own potentials. it shows how we should believe in ourselves, dont doubt ourselves and anybody else's because we're learning... till death. human can change and human is a mysterious creature.

human were given power to dream, to achieve those dreams and to realise it. yeah, like the words motivation = to live with motive and take action to achieve it.

laskar pelangi is one of a kind. it has so many elements that is basic and significant in human's lives but yet, nobody pays attention to it since human tend to look at things in a very shallow ways these days.

look at Lintang. he said 'we have to have ambition, something to aim for in life'. he knew he may inherit his father's occupation as fisherman someday if anything happen, but tried so hard to "believe in himself" that he can change their lives. he has the power to believe. that's is most important in everybody's live.

now look at me. (hehe). i'm in the process of finishing my Degree studies. and i now feel as if i'm aimless already to live. it's obvious that i will obtain the name as degree holder and then what? hmm.. so live life with aim. once achieved, we can never stop. aim higher and higher. it's your self fulfillment or according to Maslow's hierarchy of needs, Self-actualisation. you realise your character and your own potentials. you live your life to the fullest with no regret.

i saw some quote saying that "one ideal to regret is to regret for not trying".. so,dare to try.. and .. dare to dream, have the power to believe in yourself... there's always ups and downs..and that's life. life is the perfect teacher for us to attain characterised personality to live in this world and hereafter.

remember to live wisely.. as this world is the farmyard of deeds for the true life in hereafter. may barakah shimmers its light in your heart. Thanks Allah for this opportunity.

aku 23 tahun 365 hari..

2009-04-26T00:09:00.000+08:00

iye. buffday aku.. hari ni.

guruku tersayang..terima kasihku..

2009-04-24T18:16:00.005+08:00

hari ni aku down gile. penat otak. sebab tadi supervisor observed aku. and aku tak perform. arghh.

eventhough she said dont take it to heart, there's still room for improvement bla bla. and me, chilling out on the surface said "it's okay madam. i'm learning. if no one positively critics me, how can i improved". hebat bukan? iye. my rational mind speaks out clearly at that time. but i was enticed to follow my heart. to scream out loud and release all the tension.

but i can only let my tears went down my cheeks when she left. but not in front of others to see how fragile i am. i'm not mad at the lower marks, i am mad at myself, for not able to give clear instruction, provide meaningful lesson as in correct grammar teaching. hellooooo! i'm an English teacher and i did not master English Grammar. come on la nisa. get a life!

tu lah prasaan aku le aku marah kat diri sendiri. aku kalo marah kat orang, aku blh rationalise balik and try to avoid them including NOT talking or seeing them so that i dont live in hatred, tapi bila aku marah kat diri sendiri (selalu gtu), cane aku nk buat? cane nk lari dari diri sendiri? cane taknak pikir pasal diri sendiri? hurm...

thanks farah yayum, arjun and ksya for your soothing talks and efforts.. it helps me a lot. ^-^
although i believe in my own concept of reverse motivation (will do better next time only if i'm better than others, not lower and if scored lower, i'll discard the effort and forget about giving any), i try my best to regain my SELF-RESPECT.

anyhow, credit to kaksya who showed me a song OST in laskar pelangi on appreciation to teachers from students. the songs really showed naivity and sincere. with that song, i remembered my students' faces who were satisfied in every lesson and happy and eager to learn from me .... in every following class i had with them. they came to me excitedly, asking what to learn next.

Regardless of my lecturer saying stuff for improvement (which i reckon needed for my own sake and will do something about it), the welcoming faces of my sweet little children will motivate me to create an interesting yet meaningful lesson in each period.

so, lets enjoy the song. hope your get the idea im seeing and saying. and dont forget to say something for me to go on in my teaching. i really2 need that. hope u guys can give me some pushing motivation. ^-^

Guruku Tersayang

pagiku cerahku,matahari bersinar
kugendong tas merah ku di pundak
slamat pagi smua ku natikan dirimu
didepan kls mu menantikan kami

guruku tersayang guruku tercinta
tanpamu apa jadiny aku
tak bisa baca tulis mengerti banyak hal
guruku terima kasih ku

nyatanya diriku kadang buat mu marah
namun segala maav kau berikan

slamat pagi smua ku natikan dirimu
didepan kls mu menantikan kami

guruku tersayang guruku tercinta
tanpamu apa jadiny aku
tak bisa baca tulis mengerti banyak hal
guruku terima kasih ku

nyata diriku kadang buat mu marah
namun sgala maav kau berikan

guruku tersayang guruku tercinta
tanpamu apa jadiny aku
tak bisa baca tulis mengerti banyak hal
guruku terima kasih ku

early practicum...

2009-04-14T14:24:00.004+08:00

let's go through this thing fast and furious.. hehe (teringin nk tgk cte tuh.. owh!)

ok. yesterday, we were being introduced at the assembly and right after that, we (my partner and i) were asked to take over a relief class : tahun 1 Arif. being blurred and blocked, we asked them to sing the head and shoulder knee and toes after they introduce themselves to us. we asked them to call us my the name "miss".. so alyaa will be "Miss Alyaa" and me, Miss Nisa..

hurm..

so, after that, we get to meet PK1, the one who responsible to discuss and give us timetable for 11 weeks we are there. the funny thing was, we did a drawlot, to know who got to teach what year. it was a long advice and introduction by pk1 which were very interesting and meaningful for us, the newbies in this business.

after a while, it is decided that i got year 5 English and Alyaa got year 3. For local studies, we both got Year 4. how interesting~!

so, we went to search the winning teachers who get us to replace their class. hehe. upon meeting local studies' teacher, i asked him if he can show me first how to conduct his class of 4 Arif. anyhow, he agreed and i smiled widely as the the universe (hehe) since i dont need to do a lesson plan for the class. malas! haha

today, i followed him to the class. it was very enthusiastic class where he managed the students well. and the students called him ustaz. it struck me straight to my heart and soul because he doesnt appear so. he's is more like abg wan su .. hehe. more like a metrosexual but manly la. senang cite, he's very kemas and yet strict yang gentle. unik kan? hurm, i like the way he teaches those children. class control in good. i learnt so much.

and at 1205 just now, i attended English class year 5 Arif, pretty much disappointed with myself of stating the lines "ok, take out your text book". i hate those line of work but i still uses it. you know why? because i dont prepare my material yet. for this whole week, i can say my heart will not fullheartedly give efforts to make a wonderful and meaningful lesson, something that is out of the text book. insyaAllah next week will be better.

although tomorrow i have (i mean the whole malacca) holiday, i still have classes on Thursday and Friday. dont forget the football meeting on 16th april. huhu

right now, i feel like going to recreational park or have some sweat-pouring activity. huhu. because i have too many sleep in my comfy one-room.. hehe.. oh ya, just now, i just finish the buddy-assistance for eTems teachers. haha.. it was an amazing experience to teach senior teachers about English. alhamdulillah the teachers are all friendly and welcoming. thanks Allah.

and now, i just feel like sleeping. but seeing the computer with internet, i feel like writing..keep updating.. since it might help me for my reflection in practicum portfolio. ^-^

last but not least, i want to wite a letter to a heart;

dear heart,

i really wish that i can say it straight to you,
that i miss you,
because everything in my mind is about you,
my heart palpitate insanely rapid,
that ache the chest i couldnt bare to hold..

i miss you so much,
but i dont have the gut to tell you so..
i want to love you,
because i feel it's okay to open my heart for you,
but i dont know you'll love me back or not,
and i'm afraid that i'll lose you..
or you'll leave or even hurt me..

this feeling is annoyingly sweet,
that i couldnt even erase your voice in my head
which already runs in my blood to my heart..

although i'd never met you,
you seems so near to me,
as if i can see through the distance
the smile you have for me.

believe me,
i smile whenever i think of you..
my heart ^-^

hugs and kisses,
-miss nisa-

bergambar di saat akhir di serindit

2009-04-10T04:57:00.004+08:00

Gambar-gambar kali ini diambil sehari sebelum paper last untuk final exam yang last sekali untuk program TESL 6tahun ini..

enjoy~

inilah cinta kami.. ececece
begitulah alkisah baya-chan and mirako-sensei

huhu

kami memang suka beriadah di waktu petang lebih-lebih lagi di taman bukit serindit, melaka.

iye.. kami masih muda.. baru 24tahun.. hahahahaha

ini cinta kami.. (gambar hiasan jer ngeh ngeh ngeh)

aku pun serupa mahu bercinta.. tetapi aku sangat malu.. hinggakan baya-chan ketawa berbahak-bahak.. hihi ^0^

kami bertiga seakan chiken chop. chicken chop xsedap dimakan tanpa gravy/sauce nye dan mesti dimakan dengan fork and spoon.. kalo tidak, tak sedap. begitulah kami.. tanpa salah seorang.. dunia seakan malap.. fahamlah sape chicken, sape gravy, sape fork and spoon.. yang penting kami = chicken chop yang sedap. atau boleh di umpamakan seperti keenakan semulajadi ayam di Kenny Roger's.. (drooling..) slurp!

ohya, walau kami bertiga ni serious blogger, namun hanya mereka berdua yang sangat rajin menulis.. saya hanya suka membaca dan mengomen dan berfikir tentang menulis.. tapi.. hanya di dalam minda.. tidak direalisasikan sebab .. ntah. hihi

ohya, ini cerita di serindit.
huhu.. masa tengah jalan sorang2 untuk satu pusingan, saya terserempak seorang perempuan middle-aged, pakai baju hijau kaler macam the one dalam blog mr.kueh, tapi tulisan nye amat ketara perbezaan nye.

it shows C.I.A
ganas kan? tapi di bawahnya tertera

jeng jeng jeng

Certainly I'm Available

hahaha
terus saya gelak sorang2. dah la masa tu masa saya rasa malu-malu. kih kih kih
ape da...

dan masa aerobik atau jogging atau jalan.. saya juga kerap kali terserempak dengan seorang lelaki yang kalo dari jauh kelihatan seperti Enrique Iglesias, iye.. siap dengan taik yang paling comel atas muka bumi ini.. mestilah taik lalat..

sungguh tak tipu. dengan perasaan kagum, saya pura-pura tak nampak dia tu, sebab mahukan kepastian, pernah sama jogging dan terserempak (iye la jogging bertentangan arah)..maka baru lah terperasan yang dia ni Enrique versi melayu..

mujur tak mintak autograph je.. hehehe

aerobik sangatlah best.. tapi itu hari sangan penat, hanya mampu main2 tangkap gambar dan gelak kuat-kuat dengan perasaan malu berkeliaran didalam hati.. keh keh keh..

ohya, ini petang akan saya naik lori bersama housemate saya untuk membawa diri ke jasin. kami pindah sebab kami ditempatkan untuk berpraktikum di SK Jasin. dokan kami ye.
baya, kamu jangan lupa saya ye. kamu tu selalu sibuk je memanjang.. mirah.. datang la umah aku di Jasin, bawak skali budak baya tu sama itu gadis ayu Sushi dan Farah.. hihi

ok lah.. saya mahu sambung mengemas. babai...
ohya.. C.I.A~~~

we did it!!

2009-04-09T12:24:00.002+08:00

exam baru je habis.
air mata masih ada ni.
sungguh.

sangat sedih sbb td last paper
last for the whole 6 years together
sedih sbb byk sgt memory bersama
tak boleh diungkap dengan kata
perasaan tidak dpt didefinisikan.

apa pun
aku akan tetap sayang kamu sume
TESL girls IIUM/IPPM

with hugs and kisses,
indah

we're struggling... short 2009 planner...

2009-04-04T07:58:00.007+08:00

i just came back from Kota Bharu to malacca this morning..
i took an 8pm bus ride and arrived at 620am at melaka central.
so, i'm here. hehehe

it had been a joyful week for me to be back to my hometown. i had a time-out with my siblings at the river front as well as beaches alongside northen Kelantan. i just love nature and serene scene. ^-^

so much so,
on 6th April straight to 9th, my friends and I will sit for our final exam as undergraduates. this is the last exam of 6 years studying for B.Ed TESL. it's been tremendous efforts and experiences for us which at last has come to an end. hopefully, this final exam will offer and grant us excellency academically, mentally and spiritually.

and starting 13th april, my partner and i will start teaching in 3months teaching practicum in SK Jasin, Malacca. so, we're moving out from our house in central malacca on 10th or 11th. we're not able to online for about a week or so, says my mother, as streamyx takes time to be transferred to.

and according to plan, we'll be posted to our permanent school shortly after practicum, which is on 1st August 2009. i hope to get a school which is at or nearer to my hometown and that's suits me, insya-Allah.

and on October, insya-Allah, we will be handed in our scroll of B.Ed TESL at IIUM by Tuanku Sultan Pahang for our Convocation Ceremony.

InsyaALLAH, everything will be better..

so girls, dont quit and keep on struggling.. live life to the fullest and get all the best! Keep a strong head up, young ladies! ^-^

p/s: hope to fill in the "tarikh kawen" also in this 2009 planner. huhu (gedik!)

***********************************************************
here is the video shoot at the river front,
of ahmad and ili became the tourism promoter for the river front..
haha..
it's 10am and we went there right after breakfast of "Roti Cotek"
^-^

and i really hope that ahmad will recover from his on-and-off fever...

sleep sitting.. poor lovely and smart ahmad.
he said he dont like people calling him Afdhal..
because they tend to pronounce it as Afdhol..
and he'd been called names like "beledo"(jelly/agar-agar)
huhu ^-^ he just dont like to be called names..
no one does..

-miss u much, amad-

reflection letter.. (on request by fellow friends)

2009-03-28T07:16:00.011+08:00

-thanx syaz for the pic-

I wanted to post my reflection letter regarding my two institutions..

Differences between IIUM and XYZ (my teacher trainee college)

IIUM is way beyond XYZ in many aspects; that is why I believe that these 2 institutions are incomparable. One thing they shared is the common knowledge transfer via teaching and learning process which both of them has their own limitations and strengths in resources available for students.

Looking back on the factors, these two world-apart institutions have their own issues in dealing with students. IIUM serves better when it comes to infrastructure, teaching stuffs, knowledge distribution ranging from plain information to the spiritual delicacies and of course the just-right-learning environment. In fact, IIUM especially INSTED has includes TESLians in their schedules and programmes as if we were as important as any other students; despite we were thrown here and there when we were in XYZ. We felt very much appreciated and respected by all the IIUM community and as a matter of fact, TESL students were acknowledged and recognized with high integrity as its own established entity. The community upholds TESL students as if the name ‘TESL’ has been carved into their heart and mind which whenever and whoever speaks of TESL, nothing devious are spoken of. Basically, TESL students and its names are very well accepted into the community and bring about good reputation among others.

Infrastructure aspect is way beyond compare between IIUM and XYZ. We all knew it but perhaps I could explain more on how the infrastructure help us TESLians in the studies. Basically, good environment with spaces of tranquility and serene environment can soothe our emotional state of being to become logical in handling stress. Water fronts, river that flows, smart architecture of buildings and nature design help us building inner strength to love and learn better. It helps us to rejuvenate ideas as well as finding our true self. The memory of enjoying ourselves at sport complex which has Olympic sized swimming pool, gymnasium, jogging track, tennis court, volley ball and basketball court and so many other had given such an enormous impact on me, personally. There I find my true self, actively indulge in sports as well as strengthen friendships and ukhuwah in the community. Canoeing in the lake and biking up on the hills as well as watching The Drift on certain occasions had given me the feeling of joy and gayness. The food is another amazing story. Whenever we are stressed out or had an appetite change, we never ran out of ideas in trying new delicacies especially Italian or Turkish delight. Every range of food is available inside and outside IIUM, just name it. We were really happy to have the taste of variety of food before coming to back to this secluded XYZ.

Truthfully, we will never feel entirely left out when we were in IIUM as there were so many activities and programmes to be discovered now and then. Not to forget the Mahallah or the hostel. The infrastructure is incredible and our privacy is taken care of. Each student was provided with a compartment and trust me, it is beautiful and comfortable yet simple; again far beyond compare of any facilities XYZ can offer. The services and facilities are top notch; since some of us are trusted to become leaders of Mahallah Representatives as well as Students Representative Counsel. Our voices are never nuisance and every words are counted as long as we fight for our rights. The administrator might be sometimes rigid, but when the religion is concerned, students’ right are never been neglected.

Enough with all the boastful experiences which I guarantee, are beyond compare to any other trainee colleges especially XYZ. That is why I have told earlier, these two separate institutions should never be compared to. However, perhaps this will do us good in some way, Insya-Allah.

Apparently, XYZ had been holding grudges to TESLians for some reason that we were not quite sure. Buzzing bees did tell us why but it did not seem logical; they say we are proud of ourselves to become an English person with blue eyes and speaking English with irrational pride. Our voices are never been heard of unless we channeled it to media in order to seek attention. XYZ lacks in rapport with students, instead just reporting what students should and should not do; just like a married couple who live with no happiness; just plain you-say-I-do method. The XYZ never recognized TESL students as their asset but rather as a pest that is annoyingly existed outside their doors. They never welcome us, even when we first set our steps in here. It would be a big bluff if I say there was no one that cared for us, thank Gracious God for giving us strong-willed lecturers, who may want to hear, I really mean, only hear our voices. At least, we were accepted back then, by some people.

Speaking of infrastructure, we, TESLians had been fighting for so long that it seems to tire us, so that XYZ can improvised its appearance. Back then, we even fight through BPG, newspaper and all, so that XYZ can be changed for the better. Old dusty buildings malfunctianal-ly left out to become history in its own names. That is when Allah sends new director of XYZ who entertained TESLians and recognized our potential for future leaders. She helped us figured out what need to be changed since we believed that changes are crucial to the orthodox XYZ mindset. As one of my lecturers once said that “the things we always do are not supposedly right, therefore, we must make it right so that we can always do the right thing”.

Truthfully, no one saw and felt what TESLians had. We were accused of everything wrong and never other students. We were always highlighted as the brute beast who did not know how to follow stupid orders like “no drama making with male attire”, “pretend you are okay even if you dying-ly sick”, “pretend you are bad girl even if you are attending prayers 5 times a day to BISA”, “do not run if you were chased by angry lecturer”, “do not put a strong face when you were scolded” and so many others. May be these were seen as little bugs to an adult, but to a coming of age teenagers, it was a big deal.

Hence, being portrayed as villains to the community had subsequently bonded us even stronger. We managed to decrease our affection to XYZ without jeopardizing our studies and maintaining our rapport with lecturers. Our deeds had never been highlighted, just as I thought, such as Usrah programme in BISA, creation of cohort uniform, Cyber café and later internet in library, extra resources in library, and air-conditioned classes as well as flourishing XYZ name all over Malacca through choir performances. The hostel, of shall I say, the small shared rooms with limitation to water sources were real hard to live with, but we survived and it taught us the meaning of friendship and sacrifice. We valued our friendship so much because friends will help us out during in search for water as early as 4 in the morning. Sometimes, we went to class with toothbrush so that we can brush our teeth when there was no water at all. Perhaps, indirectly, God give us the chance to learn the living skill of “live life to the fullest while you can” that God eventually granted our wishes to have absolute ideal place such as IIUM in our lives.

Teaching and learning process which took place in IIUM and XYZ are quite the same. IIUM offers a wider range of possible lecturers to teach us including from Institute of Education (INSTED), CELPAD, IRK and Human Sciences’ kulliyyah. In IIUM, we can have lectures from foreign countries and get to know some. One of them is Dr.Kabuye Uthman Sulaiman who teaches us UNGS 2030-2050. He said that “UIA is no doubt the best place in Malaysia but many never realize that until they leave it. While in UIA one is continuously reminded about Allah". That is the best thing about IIUM. We were always reminded of how to be good Muslims, not just good teachers. No doubt that teaching is sacred profession, but we are human, no one is spiritually vacuum. IIUM is the best place in Malaysia if you ever want to get closer to Allah. The atmosphere is just there. All lessons are guided through Islamic perspective, not at the end of it, rather, were always reminded and guided through lesson. Despite our ignorance in fashion, lecturers will try their best to remind us of love for Islam and ourselves. Not only the food for stomach is served but also the food for the heart and soul are also taken care of. We also had close relationships with lecturers especially Dr.Ariffin Mamat who responsible for Student Affairs of INSTED. He will always give full support to our activities despite all the hardships to get through the paperwork but he believes that TESL can perform better and better. He personally congratulated our TESL Community Weekend (TCW) Programme which successfully gathered 4 other TESL-BPG students from UITM, UKM, UUM, UPM to attend a theater competition and IIUM De Tour. He was so pleased to see the optimum human potential put forward to execute such a big programme by none other than 50 TESLian Cohort 2, all young ladies! Despite our indulgences with teaching and learning and students’ activities, we were also entrusted to become the BEDSA (Bachelor of Education Student Association) leaders and committee, by executing programmes and maintaining students’ welfare as well as building good rapport with others including administrators.

Activities such as theaters, unique performances, Sisters’ Night, Talk on comparative religion, translation of quran, love and religion, and all kinds of programme brought about changes in me personally. As Madam Zainon said earlier last week that I have “toned down”, yes, as all the experiences had taken a deep impact on me which help me out in many unresolved conflicts I brought from XYZ. So, spiritually speaking, amount of knowledge gained is countless which profoundly indulged in me.

The resources in IIUM are amazing. Not just lecturers are kind enough to provide ample consultation hours for us but also the vast amount of books available in the superb library. Sometimes, when we were having assignments and examinations, library is no doubt the place for tranquility as well as for group discussions. The condusive atmosphere and the great services and facilities are very much appreciated, not like XYZ’s who are not easily talk to and hard to get help when searching for materials. Aside from the mainstream subjects we had to take, we were also required to take Quran classes, halaqah, leadership and parenting classes. The knowledge gained is immense. I appreciate the opportunity God had given me to taste such happiness with so much to gain.

I think it would be better to stop writing because it seems that I am favouring one to the other. I am not saying that XYZ is all that bad because I can see the improvement that had been made and I truly appreciate it. But what I want to see is the spirit of unity and a sense of belonging to this XYZ without prejudging and neglecting certain group of students. Administration need to acknowledge TESLians as being taught in XYZ and should try to be proud of it. We even represented XYZ to perform choir all around Malacca for the sake of XYZ’s name. Even the Chief Minister congratulated us for what we did.

All in all, both faculties inspire us in their own ways and the fact that we are able to adapt to the expectation is what others should see, not condemn. We believe we had everything in utmost effort and we love to ASK for reasons because we cannot follow blindly to anything suggested, and that does not mean that we're rebellious. Accept us for who we are and guide us.. not guard us because we're no children anymore. ^-^

p/s: we love the experience, learning together, about life, teaching and love, make us stronger each day to face any obstacles.. go go chaiyok! (mind the lousy spelling and grammar)

malas..

2009-03-25T02:04:00.003+08:00

malas..

adalah

perkataan yang paling senang dan kerap aku ucapkan dalam masa terdekat ni

malas.. bukan seperti typical malas..

tapi malas yang cool..

contohnya:

"malas nak layan, just go with the flow"
"malas nak buat lagi esemen tu, bukan sebab stress atau takde idea, tapi sebab purely malas nak layan".. kikiki

i got lots of stories to tell.. but i practically.. M.A.L.A.S hahaha
such as;

1. istimewa sangat ..cerita amad
2. technology enhance human interface, especially the deaf and dumb
3. human heart- its fragility and psychic freedom ... cerita kawan2
4. kawan2 sudah ramai kawen, tunang.. is it a good sign?

tu je la kot
nanti sambung.. sebab dah malas nak layan perasaan malas ni.
hahaha

M>malas nak layan
A>akulah
L>layan nak malas
A>aku lagi
S>salam..

MALAS vs SALAM

^-^

sedikit tentang amad...

2009-03-08T07:46:00.010+08:00

HAPPY 7TH BIRTHDAY AMAD!!!!
(his real name is Ahmad Afdhal)

well, tomorrow, I'll be having my micro-teaching in the morning, and in the evening, I'll be off to UK.. eh.. KB (hehe) my dearest hometown.

This post is dedicated truly for my dearest amad.. he's going to be 7 by tomorrow, Friday the 13th, 2009. I had called him earlier this week saying that I'm going to be home and he asked back, when? (well, this time around he's not in the mood, you know.. and I dont know why)

nisa9: mok, acu gak nok kecek nge amad smeta
mok: ok. smeta.
amad: hello? bye!
nisa9: ehhh.. amad.. bakpo ni? hello...
amad: ho.. gapo?
nisa9: amadd... kakak nok balik ni. jumaat ni key harijadi amad.
amad: bilo?
nisa9: jumaat ni. kakak nok beli kek ko amad.
amad: toksey kek buoh!
nisa9: ha? owh. ok ok.. kakak beli kek coklat. (i'm thinking of buying secret recipe's Chocolate Indulgence)
amad: toksey. nok kek Doreamon!
nisa9: uh? nok beli mano?
amad: ado key kat kedai kek maso amad gi nge kakak tuh.
nisa9: owh ok ok. hurm.. bakpo amad bad mood ni?
amad: (silence) huk huk ... huk....
nisa9: la bakpo ni...
amad: ok lah. bye
nisa9: erk. ok ok bye.

well, if you dont understand the conversation, ask a kelantanese to translate it for you.by the way, this is just children's talk. it's much easier that our normal conversation. hehe

hurm.. amad lately is quite busy with his new life routines.
early morning, he wakes up earlier than others in the house, take a bath and perform Subuh prayer. He makes himself ready for school and off he goes (my ayoh send him la kan).

his school finishes at 2.15, and he has to go for nursery in front of his school because my parents could not fetch him at the afternoon. So, late evening, at about 6pm, mu mother fetch him. and at 630 he will miserably cry because he still did not perform Asar prayer. hehe

at night, if we (other siblings) misses him and give him a call, he never could answer because he's already fast asleep although it's only 8pm. haha.. too tired i guess.
and during holidays, he will be busy playing bicycle in the evening that makes him fast asleep at about 8pm also.

almost everyday, we talk to each other, expressing how much we misses amad especially ones who were out of town; me, anis, ejak and apis. huhu

before i munch more words, let's take a look at these faces of amad:

amad loves to take a dive in Splash Water: Wet a Little

I dont know where and when this picture this taken, but sure he and ili are cute ^-^

and this picture took place in Pantai Irama Bachok when we, all 8 siblings, embark on a journey for a siblings-only-to-the-beach-trip and of course amad couldnt hold long to dive into the shining water. hehe

Again, these green creatures loves to spend their time in the swimming pool. Thank God, Kota Bharu has a Splash Water. hehe

and Eid-ul-adha.. as usual, my family together with other 6 big families gathered for the korban. from left, amad, ili aisyah and fatma aqilah (cousin).

well well well... look at this piece! amad's picture is candidly captured while he, feeling amused, tried to connect the flowers to make necklace, bracelet and what so ever. I taught him to taste the little honey it had at the end of its stigma (i forgot the term) hehe.

and this photo!! at first, i thought it was ili, instead, on 2nd look, amad is actually wearing ili's scarf~ haha.. and yet, i dont know who tell him to. hahaha

and this smirky face.. he made a face when i tell him to pose/smile. haha.. amadd.. amadd...

neways, i have another story to tell..

one evening, i got angry with him since he started to develop a hobby of riding his bicycle far away from home, which is very.. very dangerous.
as usual, i started mumbling it's not good to go by yourselves, you dont love mom, you dont love me, you dont love yourselves, kinda talk.

and he gets me to bathe him. well, children... hurm..
while showering him with shower gel and shampoo and all..
he explains..

amad: kak tau dok bakpo amad gi tubik main jauh-jauh?
nisa9: bakpo?
amad: sebab amad nok cari gewe la ko kak..
nisa9: ha?!!
amad: yo la.. kalu amad gi main jauh-jauh, nati ado ore mari tanyo amad ko gapo... amad buleh la bowok jupo kak. mano tau ado ore baik... hensem.. erm.. kak, kak toksey ko ko awal tu? kak nok ore supo awal ko Fahrin ko? (Awal Shaari and Fahrin Ahmad, the actor, i dont know why he likes them so much)..
nisa9: amboii... amad ingat amad tu comey sangak ko sapa ore mari nok tegur-tegur amad, pah amad siak nok bowok jupo kakak. amad ingat kakak ni comey sangak ko? hahaha
amad: comey.. gemuk sikik jah..

hahahahahahahahahaha

aku tatau nak rasa apa dah.. nak marah.. nak gelak.. bercampur baur... hehehe

ape-ape je la amad. yang penting, i love you with all my heart. grow up and be a great and useful person, untuk dunia dan akhirat. Selamat hari lahir, adikku.

hugs and kisses,
-kakak caca-
*********************************
p/s: amad now starts to perform all 5 prayers a day.alhamdullah.
p/s2: enjoy this clip from amad in his younger years. ^-^

kurosagi.. kamu hebatlah!

2009-02-25T19:28:00.004+08:00

I should consider today as one of the gloomy day I had. I felt terribly ill-hearted that I think I just say straight to her face, which I didn’t, of course.

Sometimes I had to imagine things I should have done (but I would regret it if I ever did so I did not do it) to calm myself. I usually diverted my feelings to surf around the internet, most probably blogs or YouTube or even watch some downloaded movies. Well, I guess it’s time for anime. So I watched Bleach Movie – Diamond Dust Rebellion. It was segoi (s-goi-e) means AMAZING! as Japanese puts it.

Okay. Enough with the introduction. Let’s get back to real deal now. The reason I acted out so pissed of, is because I cannot do thing the way I want it to. It’s not like a big thing but it had affected my way of finishing my assignment. The condition of my house, I currently stay in Malacca, is kind of bad with pests and it had affected me, personally and some other housemates. We cannot do work in fear. Plus, my problems with people keep adding up.

It’s hard to do things with heart swollen up, so I watched the movie. Towards the end of it, Kurosagi Ichigo said;

“As long as we’re alive, there are going to be times when we don’t agree with others, but you have to decide how you will let that affect your life”

So it struck me.

How bad the mood I have, I am the one who decide how it affect me. I should not let them (ones I had problems with) overpowered me. May be I’m the only one who felt so which means I have not affected them that very much. So why bother?

I decide my life, my reputation and my feelings. Huhu

It’s all in my control, my power. What’s beyond control is God’s will and fate.

************************************************************************

Let me share with you 1 big problem my family and I encountered for the past 2 months.
(I thought of a short post but I guess it can’t be helped)

Well, refer to this post.

My family and I have been encountered by the Jinns and devils (syaitan) which caused problems to each and every members of my family. From my father to my amad (lil brother), all of us are infected with such a problem but the most prominent one is my sister, number 6 (no.6). she is 9 years and on 2nd of December 2008, she’s been struck with mysterious cases of all. Becoming all sorts of thing such as behavior of a tiger, snake and monkey. It is scary, you know, to watch you beloved sister becoming such and such and get hold of her who’s trying to kill herself. She said that she lost control of herself and she could not do anything about it. Even when she prayed, the thing pull and and push her and require us, the other siblings to hold her while she was praying.

This is beyond imagination. People who came to visit often did not believe until they saw with their own eyes; they hurriedly asked to excused themselves and we all just played plain understanding. It’s SCARY… we all have to bear with it.

Long story short, after spending thousands of money for cure, finally my sister managed to be herself again, which took approximately 2 months and a half with the ups and downs. she fainted, kicked and hit something and somebody whenever she lost control. Hurm.. it’s pretty much to absorb, right?

Whatever it is, we thank Allah for his love and mercy; that Allah don’t let the problems take control of the family’s affair (although it’s hard to get thru it)… but we managed to curb the problem slowly.

Just imagine, we are a big family of 8 siblings, plus parents, it becomes 10 heads of problems. Everybody suffered inside out and my parents suffered hideously; Hope they’ll be stronger and stronger.

Anyway, despite what people says of not to fight with the fate and just doa and pray to Allah; we decide to curb the problem with ‘ikhtiar’ (ways) thru Islamic ways; ones that rely on Allah with stronger and powerful use of Alquran, insyaAllah.

So, what I’m trying to say here is, no matter what happens, believe in yourself and Allah and other people who cares about you. Don’t let problems with anything affect your life badly. Be positive, insyaAllah, God shall brightens His love upon you.

Just remember what Kurosagi Ichigo said;

“As long as we’re alive, there are going to be times when we don’t agree with others, but you have to decide how you will let that affect your life”…

*********

Have a wonderful life! Chaiyok!

Meet Bung Shinoda 2

2009-02-22T00:12:00.007+08:00

well, i dedicated this post particularly for teachers!
want to know why?
hmmm..

u must first read Bung Yoshz post : Meet Bung Shinoda.. <-- click here!
then you can understand why this post call Meet Bung Shinoda 2

haha..
why teachers?

well, this clip shows how FAIL,
teachers can be... in teaching English!

the Bung Shinoda as coined by Bung Yoshz,
has no idea that he's being funny, making him sounds silly,
which downgrade himself as an entertainer..
i think he should define being entertainer really was.

he was William Hung wannabe.

seriously, this is FUNNIEST ever.. but this is also SCARY..
haha.. well teachers.. you allz should avoid all this things..

see, learn and react..
REACTIVE is a always... PROACTIVE is a must!

and remember..
everybody is teachers.. teachers of life! pis! <-- this is Bung Shinoda style! hahaha..

peace!! enjoy, learn and proactive~

Let's SING with Bung Shinoda!!!
I've become so numb I can't feel you there
Become so tired so much more aware
I'm becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you

Can't you see that you're smothering me?
Holding too tightly, afraid to lose control
Cause everything that you thought I would be
Has fallen apart right in front of you

still not asleep (masih tidak tdo!)

2009-02-20T18:28:00.006+08:00

this is a very short entry
it's really short, you know.

hm.. i havent slept for almost 2 days now.
gotta to stay awake to finish my endless literature assignment.
it's not like i do it at the eleventh hour,
but it's just dont finish.
as simple as that.

fuhhh... alhamdulillah i managed to submit on the due date,
but almost 5 hours later than scheduled.. haha
so, i dont know whether the lecturer going to consider mine and my fellow friends.
she said something about deducting marks,
hmm.. i've done my best,
put the efforts until my head nearly goes haywire.
and before i could edit them (the ASSignments) for the last time,
my PC's power supply went haywire (haha.. before me)..
shocked and stunned..
i'm thinking..
thinking... and thinking...
think again... and again...
i dont want to cry.. because my heart dont feel like it..
but deep down, the anxiety is there..

so, i picked up my hp.. and dialed a name.. (yeah.. nowadays people dont go for number no more)
and.. my ANGEL friend said he could help.
alhamdulillah..
all the way from Em Em Yu, he came..
it's already 1058 a.m .. 2 minutes to the deadline..
hmmm...

it's rather depressing u know..
but my housemate lend me her lappy (laptop..)
so that i can edit my work transferred to alyaa's tam (thumbdrive)
but right before the Friday prayer, i realised that i missed 1 more file
inside my hdd (harddisk) in the power supply-less PC.
adehh..

i have to call for his help again, (*maluuuu*)
and he came, suggesting for me to install the power supply by myself..
and i smiled.. but deep down, ..
i'm crying hard... i'm think-less (abis rusak bahasa)..
but consider him is late for prayer, i tried.

and i did..
successfully.. but the command says "Reboot or connect the ... bla bla bla"
by that time, my heart is already drown in tears.
and again.. you know.. AGAIN..
i message him, stating the command displayed.

seriously, i feel like crying
if one does not feel like crying, he/she is no human being.
the work i did .. burning the midnight oil..
since a month ago, little by little..
composing litetrical texts of 38 pages + 18 pages of academic writing and a lesson plan
(well, all mt batch of TESLians at my place have to do it)..
seems to be unreachable..
it hurts you know.
but magically no tears well up inside my eyes..
hehe :D

so, he called. saying this and that. i lastly, i managed to see the background of my WentworthMiller.
hmm.. alhamdulillah. i've been able to retrieve those files, and he already at the front gate,
ready to offer some help. i'm sorry for my inconviences, my friend. your help is GREATly appreciated.

thanks to my housemates, Alyaa for the moral and printer supports and Fiza (for the lappy)..
i'm glad to be able to submit on the date
although i'm still responsible for the consequences of submitting it later than necessary.
haha

and thanks Allah..
for giving me so much help
for giving me the opportunity to have a friend like the one.
you are a true friend. hehe

p/s: when will you get married with your girl? i'm looking forward for your happiness with her!
thanks again... for everything. and for being a friend .. for being there...

^-^ glad to finish my assignment and finally be able to have some decent sleep..
before heading off to another awaiting assignment.

p/s: Madam, your assignment kills my PC's power supply..
imagine if it's our brain..or my brain.. (nauzubillah)

************************************************************************************
before ends, lets enjoy a new song.. which is rather sissy for those hardcore.. hehe
but for me, the message is beautiful. a song by miley cyrus called The Climb.

I can almost see it.
That dream I'm dreamin
But there's a voice inside my head saying you'll never reach it.
Every step I'm taking.
Every move I make feels
Lost with no direction.
My faith is shakin.
But I,I gotta keep tryin.
Gotta keep my head held high.

There's always gonna be another mountain.
I'm always gonna wanna make it move.
Always gonna be an uphill battle
Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose.
Ain't about how fast I get there.
Ain't about what's waitin on the other side.
It's the climb.

The struggles I'm facing.
The chances I'm taking.
Sometimes might knock me down but
No I'm not breaking.
I may not know it but these are the moments that
I'm gonna remember most, yeah.
Just gotta keep going.
And I, I gotta be strong.
Just keep pushing on 'cause,

There's always gonna be another mountain.
I'm always gonna wanna make it move.
Always gonna be an uphill battle
But Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose.
Ain't about how fast I get there.
Ain't about what's waitin on the other side.
It's the climb.

Yeah-yeah

There's always gonna be another mountain.
I'm always gonna wanna make it move.
Always gonna be an uphill battle
Sometimes you're gonna have to lose.
Ain't about how fast I get there.
Ain't about what's waitin on the other side.
It's the climb.

Yeah-yeah-yea

Keep on moving,
Keep climbing,
Keep the faith,
Baby.

It’s all about,
It’s all about the climb.
Keep your faith,
Keep your faith.

Whoa, O Whoa.

Momo The Prince is Not That Bad

2009-02-16T15:47:00.008+08:00

This is Momo. He is single, 18 years old and lives in Paris.

for you my Valsa... Bon Appetite !! erkk!

Look how tough he looks, right?

I am sure you all must be curious to know who is this guy and how did he come about in my life, right? well, it's all credit to Mr.Yoshz (the concerned blogger brother) who wonderfully search for my Momo. For your information, Momo is a type of person who is Male by nature but play the role of a Mimi, and a Mimi is a person who lives to support Mr.Yoshz. Out of concerned for my welfare, big blogger brother Yoshz struggle to find a Male Mimi a.k.a Momo for me.

Unfortunately, the Momo he found is a bit kinky by nature who love to pose like a girl and perhaps wants to become a cutey "ti amo" or may be the Sugar Puppy for the Datins. In my reaction towards Yoshz incredible effort, I manage to attain some of his best photos which its captions are changed so that it can show some sort of relation with me. Unlike what you can find in Mr.Yoshz entry which had somewhat embarassed Momo in a way no one can forgive (actually embarass me, personally!), this photos would suit my extravaganza character of a young lady.. heheheh *wink wink* oh my Momo.. mmuach!

hahahahahahahaahahah

To tell you the truth, Momo had become our internet victims of blogging and networking
which at the same time, had given us inspiration to write and manipulate our idea.
PLUS, Momo will get a FULL FREE ADVERTISEMENT.

so, do add Momo in your friendster --> http://profiles.friendster.com/62883168

and Let's go to Paris together!!

Momoooo.. ^-^ Here I cooommme!!

_________________________________________________________________

oops! when I was expanding my wings to find my other possible Momo, I magically found this clip
Telling people that we had to do something about people saying things to others..
well, in this case, Mr.Yoshz (hahahahaah) who BULLIED the Momo he found in friendster! hahahaha

so, how can we punish Mr.Yoshz ?? hehehe :p

hurm.. while you are thinking, let's take a look at this clip!

Safer Internet Day

Mr.Yoshz.. for this time around, you dont have your Mimi to defend you!!..
ngeeeee hahahahahaa (evil laugh!!)

^-^

Eel + Deeeelicious :p

2009-02-08T13:11:00.004+08:00

Look at this God's creature.
it's Eel.
famous to be caught in paddy fields in this kind of season.
it has many nutrients and is believed to be able to help cured certain diseases.
its blood and the liquids around its body can soften the skin;
you can compare the hands of a fishmonger or anyone who deal with fish with the ones who deal with eels. mostly, eels will be handled by young lady or fairly aged lady. And her hands .. wow.
that why, when I was little, my brother used to cut the eels himself and we all, siblings, played with the blood and body liquid.. it's like moisturizer. lol

so, having said that previously my mom cooked 2 kilograms of eels and my sister and I did not get the opportunity to taste it, we asked mom to buy 1 kilogram of it so that she can cooked it again. we chose the biggest one.1 kilogram is equivalent of a pair of eels only.

my brother, Ahmad pretended to be cool. haha

my sister, Anis with the screaming face! hahaha

my sister, Ili with a confident face!

and this someone who dare to challenge others to touch those eeeuuwww eels!
=.= huhu

****************************************************************************
this the pictures of Ahmad stylish-ing himself of cutlery that he knew nothing of. He did not know that what he is wearing is actually the smallest pan sold there in Duty Free Pengkalan Kubor, Kelantan, Malaysia.

and this one is the 'batu lesung', used to grind herbs and stir fry ingredients, and yet he poses to make horns out of it. haha. what a lovely holiday, Chinese New Year for a family trip to Pengkalan Kubor.

p/s: enjoy the pics! and Ahmad is 7 years old now, started schooling with extravaganza enthusiasm at SRI Aman, Kota Bharu. =)

unique is NOT straight!

2009-02-05T21:39:00.009+08:00

It had been a while since my last update. Tasks and things keep bundle up in me. Haiyoo… there’s not much for me to tell about my artworks, just couples of pictures showing that I can survive through art lesson. Believe me, there’s nothing STRAIGHT to me when it comes to ART. My drawings or any of the task would never include a straight line because I can never draw one. LOL. I remembered when my friends used to say that ART is windings and windings is ART.. just because..

When someone are asked to write a long answer on the board up front, the writings will either be high up or going down and down like the stock exchange rate at the Wall Streets or Basikal (BSKL in Malaysia). Huhu ^-^ it will never be as straight as the teacher used to write. So, to make things look good, it is soon considered as an ART; the unstable lines are ART.

So, living to the knowledge, my ART would never be STRAIGHT. haha

this watermelon is made using Collage technique.
it is from pieces of tissue papers dip in water colours and paste on each other
to become the shape of watermelon.

This piece of art is the Stamp technique which
uses any kinds of things,dip in colours and stamp it on papers.
for this one, I used straw, onion, ladies finger, banana leaves.

this piece is also a kind of stamp but we had to design by ourselves
the shape and shade so that it become that ART. =.=
for this one, I used potatoes to make the shapes of this SECRET GARDEN..

And this piece is made from stars papers. the technique is MOSAIC.
It has to be glued near to one another but never to be on each other.

huhu ^-^

Munajat Cinta ?!! .. hmmm

2009-01-22T12:27:00.005+08:00

I would like to share with you guys, a melidious yet deep meaning song called Munajat Cinta. It's all about asking GOD to bless him/her with someone who could appreciate him/her back. Someone that will be good for; who cared for him/her.

This song; Munajat Cinta, sang by Ahmad Dhani and The Rock, is a Ahmad Dhani's new project. Australian and Indonesian musicians working together in harmony to publish a song... asking God for the perfect someone to love...

And I found this song which was sung by an American girl. It's good for her to actually sing the song although using Malay Language with slang. Amazing isn't? segoiii!!! <-- as Japanese puts it! hehe ^-^

and I found an edited kind of remix for the song, although with some off keys , he really did a good attempt out of it. enjoy!

p/s: Thanks youtube for these videos! hehe =P
p/s2: dedicated to one of my sweetfren, JoJo a.k.a Kiera.

visual art class for teacher to be!

2009-01-17T18:11:00.007+08:00

Our final year comes with new subjects that are enjoyable and interesting.
surprisingly, we are equipped with creative subjects such as Teaching Visual Arts in Primary School. In this subject, we are exposed to variety of arts techniques. Therefore, we Love Our Homework for Visual Arts because we all together immersed during the activities! we smudged each other with ink and colours .. and we like it! =p

we like to enjoy ourselves just like children in school despite our age and even some already married. Being TESLians make us know no age! Enjoy whatever we have to achieve success .. afar..

Peace!

go Jerin!

candid!

hm.. attention to the girl in pink, Miss Qila! haha

and these are my final products! hahaha

smudgy pieces of art!

^-^

Homework, I Love You

2009-01-17T15:12:00.007+08:00

When I google the net and asked my friend for the poems to add on my assignments, I came across this direct yet cynical poem. It very interesting as homework is viewed from the cynical perspectives of its role in human lives!.. enjoy!

Homework, I Love You

by Kenn Nesbitt

Homework, I love you. I think that you’re great.
It’s wonderful fun when you keep me up late.
I think you’re the best when I’m totally stressed,
preparing and cramming all night for a test.

Homework, I love you. What more can I say?
I love to do hundreds of problems each day.
You boggle my mind and you make me go blind,

but still I’m ecstatic that you were assigned.

Homework, I love you. I tell you, it’s true.
There’s nothing more fun or exciting to do.
You’re never a chore, for it’s you I adore.
I wish that our teacher would hand you out more.

Homework, I love you. You thrill me inside.
I’m filled with emotions. I’m fit to be tied.
I cannot complain when you frazzle my brain.
Of course, that’s because I’m completely insane.

^-^

love your homework!!

you rock!!

Let me share me LOVE!!

2009-01-16T22:44:00.004+08:00

It had been several times since my business partner asked me of what my dream car was. And I said, I dont have one. May be I will take my father's Kancil and continue paying that. hmm..

And may be, after several years of teaching, I might be able to support a Honda Civic on my own.. ^-^

Then, I came across this gorgeous Toyota (although my favourite brand is Honda) I still insist on seeing more of this Toyota Mark X. But when I surf through the net, I found that Mark X has this kind of slogan saying; "Mark X, X is for Men".. huh?!!

This kind of gender bias is UNACCEPTABLE! Women should not be restricted to own one of these! It is rude you know, obstructing women to aim high (even I do not know whether I can support this car or not) but who knows, things can go unpredicted, you know! =p

-blue? black?-

-pearl white -

wow! They are amazing, huh?
Do they have hybrid engine or something?
I dont know about them but Toyota Sylphy can save petrol (gas)
down to 13 sen (RM 0.13 per km) you know,
as compared to Proton Waja of 23 sen per km.

hmm... :p

Let's bake a cake!

2009-01-16T22:34:00.004+08:00

actually, for a thousand times, I told myself that I wanted to create a post of
a home made cake I baked last Eid-adha for my family.

It is a chocolate cake with half cheese toppings and half chocolaty toppings.

Let's see if it does drools your appetite.
hehe
:p

This is Hot Stuff.
This looks never stays enough.
hahaha

bubbling as usual..

2009-01-16T13:45:00.000+08:00

My mind has always had thousand words to say when I am thinking of updating my blog, but I am now experiencing roadblocks in expressing myself as well as putting my ideas into correct words. I am scared for my state of inability which seems to be stagnant by some means. I have tried to overcome it but it seems to fail each time I put an effort on it. Perhaps, I need to something else to reboot myself.

Moving around the topics to talk to, when my mind shifting from one assignment to the other, I came to realise that human cannot escape the obligation and responsibility to themselves, their family, society as well as religion and his country and last but not least the world. "bla bla bla.. I am getting boring each time I speak my mind.." [still thinking how to present myself interestingly...]

Let me start again...

hurm...Okay!

One afternoon, after I got back from class, I come across a very CAMRY in front of a masjid. The masjid is happened to be by the roadside and therefore I started to pay attention on them which seems to be stopping in front of it. They does not seem to be a Muslim as they did not present themselves like one and in fact, I even suspected them to be stopping by just to use the toilet. owh.. how rude of me! I should be ashamed of myself because the family, eventhough did not present themselves in a way of a Muslim, they did stop by and went inside the masjid.

I peek to see what was they doing, and it shocked me to see that they somehow donated to the donation box in the Masjid and went away. How rude I am for pre-judging people of how they look. They even stopped by the Masjid to donate and which not many would do! They taught me how one should be grateful for what they have achieved in life and try to help others while they can.

For me, I am so touched when I saw somebody donating something to the needy because to donate needs a lot of willingness to sacrifice because you doesnt know whether or not you can get that amount of money back. Like I said, the willingness, honestly sacrifice or rather to share your wealth with somebody else is hard to do. But the love for wealth shall not override with the love for God and Religion. Whoever feels that their wealth belongs to them and only them, does not really understand Islam. Human is always in need of a religion, as God created Islam for human to feel "safe" and able to conform to the spiritual needs.

Gracious God has given us extra so that God wanted to know whether we are at ease to share with others or just wanted to keep for ourselves by being selfish. That is what living together all about. We should offer help while we can, willingly, for God's sake by being grateful for the rezeki.

Human can be of both, nice good person and rebellious devil. God had given human heart and mind to think and have instinct on. Therefore, human should be able to think with pros and cons while making decision.

Human cannot run with selfishness as it will pay them somehow, some way. although some will not agree to sacrifice for others, but many said that when they help others and themselves to become better, as if they are entering a new point of life, as if they feel rejuvenated.. as in doctors sees patient who they treated getting well and improving, as in when teachers saw students changes and improvements on what they have taught the students, and as in parents who saw their children success in life or achieved the goals.

Therefore, we should not pre-judge people, do not even bother to being judgmental to people because it will bring you no good, but blackened our heart and decreased our potential to become better. We should also be grateful of what we have and channel our gratefulness through the correct way that is nothing against our belief for God who created the world. In fact, God created this world for some reasons, not that the world just happen to be by itself while everything is centered from human beings.

hope my bubbling conveyed the messages successfully. =p

wsalam.

fever and all..

2009-01-14T13:09:00.003+08:00

alhamdulillah.
my father is recovering himself from appendicitis. I hope eventually he'll get hold of himself and starts to live the life to the fullest together with all of us, his family members.

Talking about diseases and all, I would like to share with you all of a picture, captured in his backyard back in Bristol, UK. He seems to be suffering of some kind of JU-ONism, where he's becoming the White all over his body. with yellow footwear he gladly stays in the backyard to scare those people to love Ghost Movie.

but one thing for sure, he's style and perspectives of sickness is rather cute where the smile never leave the face and he will maintain his manner while suffering by sitting alone backyard-ly with legs crossed ladylike. He didnt forget to close his nostrils because being backyardigans isnt always fun since he has to suffer the smell of the potion and the sewage system.

He doesnt seem to enjoy himself though.
CHICKEN POX does give him time to think about life.
Zonan, thanks for this wonderful picture.
=)

laugh all that you want!

2009-01-12T17:07:00.001+08:00

This picture was taken on August,2008
I love this picture because it makes me feel happy!
It had been some time that I didnt really enjoy myself.
I miss my happy family.
I want us, all family members to be well again,
and be able to laugh out loud while enjoying ourselves in the sun.

however, thank God for giving me
the opportunity to cherish my friends and friendship.
They're the laughter and tears of my life,
6 years of living together brings about
changes in everybody's life.

friends;
I observe and look at them,
after 6 years of ups and down,
and after hurdles and hurdles,
we all keep moving forward and
make sure everybody safe.

they taught me about life
and we all changed from the one we first met.
when we're still crybaby and selfish,
to change for the better
which prepare us to the next stage of life;
marriage

some of my friends are married,
engaged and getting something
in their lives.

unexpectedly, we all learn.
how to play smart,
how to make a difference,
how to behave,
how to control anger and emotion.
we understand each other,
though with some mishap in this friendship,
it doesnt tear so much of our feeling for each one of us,
we realise we make mistake,
and learn from it.

friends;
you've taught me a lot about life,
sacrifice, love and trust.
we changed a lot thru the years,
but deep down inside,
50 TESLians C2 will always be..

the greatest memoir of a teacher like us.

p/s: inspired by writing of cermin aku siapa?

someone..somewhere..

2009-01-10T16:55:00.002+08:00

I have just downloaded the Picasa 3 Google into my PC. I heard it is a new and simple picture editor, and as I set Picasa to browse through my PC for pictures, I mean, all the nasty to humble and gorgeous pictures taken, I managed to pick one of the humblest pictures ever.

This picture was captured in my favourite campus (IIUM) in the time for my friends' convocation. I chose this picture as it represents the timid yet beautiful smile of a proud Malay Muslim girl. And she is one of my closest friends ever.

Since she is my humble friend, I chose her picture to be my first trial or I may say, guinea pig, to replenish my talent in guessing what effects to be picked and chose on. =) So, this is it! My first attempt to use Picasa, eventhough I know my other friends could do it better.

And yet I am proud to have such an outstanding model with a little smile and the humble wind which gently blow the dress. wow, it gives beautiful effects that I dont think I even need Picasa. haha

doa untuk ayah...

2009-01-07T18:13:00.005+08:00

kawan-kawan,

doakan ayah aku ye,
tadi tengahari masuk wad,
semalam dah drip kat rumah sampai 4 botol..

ayah aku tak lalu makan,
almost 1 week dah tak makan..

Doc suspect appendicitis,
we'll see after further review and treatment..

Ya ALLAH,
sembuhkanlah ayah aku,
sihat wal-afiatlah kedua ibubapa ku..
permudahkanlah hidup ini
tabahkan hati kami..
berilah kami kekuatan
dan
murahkanlah rezeki kepada seluruh muslimin muslimat...

ameen..

ada soalan..

2009-01-07T00:02:00.001+08:00

kalo aku nak jual tudung kat blog,
agak2 ada tak org nak amik?
huhu

=)

apa2 pun, semuanya in progress..
tengoklah kesibukan aku jugak..
keh keh keh

2009-01-06T23:57:00.003+08:00

HAPPY BUFFDAY MAKKKK!!!!

HAPPY 49TH BIRTHDAY THIS YEAR!!

I LOVE YOU FOREVERRRR.....!!!

kisah cuti...

2008-12-24T16:24:00.000+08:00

"aku taknak keluar. bluewwrkk.. kau gila.kau bengong."

itulah antara jeritan adik aku yang terkena gangguan jin dan syaitan. sejak dia keluar dari hospital sabtu lepas (28 november), matanya boleh melihat yang tidak boleh dilihat atau dengan kata lain, the unseen.

The unseen ini memenuhi ruangan rumah kosong dihadapan rumah aku dan ruangan hutan di belakang rumah aku. perkataan seperti rupa-rupa yang menakutkan di atas tangga, beranda, depan rumah, di dalam akuarium, di tingkap adalah perkara biasa sepanjang 5 hari adik ku ini sakit teruk.

ahad.
lebih kurang 7 petang.
adik aku mula meracau. dikatanya ada orang tua berbibir biru datang gigit dirinya. kaki dan tangannya mula terhuyung hayang.. dia merasa seperti ditarik-tarik. kami adik beradik berusaha memegangnya. dia kata, dirinya mahu dibawa oleh 4 lembaga ke tempat lain. ke hutan. atau ke mana saja. gangguan tamat setelah berjaya menidurkan adik aku itu.

kami suspect gangguan bermula selepas menonton cerita Long Khong 2. dikatakan apa-apa yang berlaku dirumah, boleh triggers those things, termasuk muzik, cerita2 dan sebagainya kerana kita sedang mengundang dan menguatkan syaitan dan jin dan mewujudkan suasana tidak elok/tenang untuk malaikat berkuasa dalam melindungi.

isnin.
lebih kurang 3 petang.
aku dan adik aku 2 orang yang paling kecik keluar membuang sampah dari pintu belakang ke pagar depan. masuk je dalam rumah, adik aku tu mula mengatakan ada yang menarik-narik kakinya. dan kemudian, tangan dan kepala, dan kami adik beradik yang lain sibuk memegang dirinya yang sudah hilang kawalan anggota badan.

tidak tahan dengan gangguan itu, kami bertindak menelefon mak kami di tempat kerja. keadaan semakin kronik. kami bertindak ke masjid Telipot yang selalu di imarahkan. kata adikku, the unseen mengikutnya ke masjid tapi tidak dapat masuk ke perkarangan masjid dan duduk di bumbung rumah-rumah berdekatan.

****************************

nanti aku cerita lagii...
inilah punca tensi aku namun aku masih belajar tentang kehidupan...
cuti ni memang sibuk dengan banyak dugaan...
sbb tu previous post mcm org sewel!

i'm not DAT stupid (aku bukan budak kecik!)

2008-12-19T21:37:00.007+08:00

why people dont see that i'm also sacrificing a lot?

He always sees me as trash. No way i could make him proud.
Yes. i know. He's in great stress. But everybody also feels like him. we're all encountering the same great challenge, just in different angle!
i dont know if it's just the anger, but having said that he hates me for what i've done, sacrificed, as if i wasnt appreciated at all. all he saw was my bad, bad and bad. may be it's time for me to run away. he never supported me in anything new i want to indulge myself with. he never agreed until someone else told him to or someone else had achieved the goal thru the road I wanted to take.

why? huh!
it's just him. the way him be. i know i should be proud of what he is but sometimes i felt that i couldnt, not that I deliberately dont.

wutever it is, although how sick he felt for me, i should never be down nor disrespect him.
Oh Allah, gimme great strengths to face this life. Grant all our wishes to be well in this world and Hereafter.

Plz, O Almighty God, Punish and Burn all the satans and Jins who troubled us. Let us be strong and Save us from them and ourselves.

p/s: i feel like screaaaaaammiiiiiiiingggg!!!

eidul adha di Kota Bharu...

2008-12-09T11:23:00.011+08:00

8hb December 2008.
630 pagi. ahmad, adik bongsu aku, 6 tahun, bangun untuk ke toilet. aku tengok jam, alamak, dah lewat ni. Subuh! dah la hari raya! sekarang ni total members dalam rumah aku adalah 11 orang. isk. sempat ke nak bersiap.

8 pagi. semua bergegas ke masjid telipot untuk solat sunat hari raya aidiladha.
aku? masih menunggu yang lain bersiap. agak jarang boleh bersiap awal. hehe
815 pagi. sempat ke masjid dan bersolat di tingkat atas walau aku tengok sudah ramai yang bertindak memilih untuk solat di bawah khemah.

9 pagi.
tiba di rumah. dan breakfast. makan roti goreng, adik aku anis yang sediakan. yummy!
dan 1030pagi, tiba di rumah pak saudara aku, PokSuMey di Ketereh, Kota Bharu, Kelate.
makan lagi. haha. bihun, pulut pagi dan tapai. best!

kul 12tghari. my relatives yang lebih kurang 14 keluarga, berkumpul untuk upacara korban. kali ini, 2 ekor lembu. dan proses penyembelihan, pelapahan, pemasakan, pemakanan bermula. 3 petang, persiapan hidangan sedia. menu kali ini, Singgang Daging, Daging Goreng dan Sayur Goreng. dan semasa proses pelapahan, pembakaran daging tersebut juga diadakan.

sangat best! BBQ in process. dan selepas membahagi-bahagikan daging2 tersebut mengikut 7 bahagian masing-masing, Lembu 1 memberikan 5kg each bahagian dan Lembu 2 memberikan 6.5kg each.

sambil bincang2 dan bersedia untuk akad korban kerana Allah..

antara yang hadir...

abang aku usik ahmad..

buang kulit...

proses pelapahan...

sempat lagi posing adik2 aku ni..

kali ini, raya haji adalah best seperti yang sebelumnya. kita semua enjoy!! hehe sangat meriah dan menyeronokkan. i like! ngee sungguh meriahh..

p/s: aku update ni pun, xsempat nak bebel panjang, sebab hari ni nak gerak ke Pengkalan Kubor untuk shopping dan ke Tumpat untuk ke majlis Aqiqah anak sepupuku. huhu =)

kerap kali...

2008-11-27T16:31:00.003+08:00

kerap kali ku mengadap PC di rumah ini..
aku jadi kosong [bukan bulat macam donut tu, tapi kosong "empty"]

cerita 1

amad: kak, kak pakai la seksi sikit, baru ramai orang suka kat akak.
[amad, adik bongsu aku, tiba-tiba bersuara]
aku: apa? aish. siapa ajar ni? Dosa tahu tak?
amad: ala, bukan seksi sangat pun, pakai macam kat rumah.
aku: amboi, ni pengaruh TV ke apa ni? aish. ingat sikit dosa dan neraka.
[tegur aku kepada adik aku yang ber-idea nakal yang baru berumur 6 tahun]
amad: hehe. ye ye. toksey toksey. amad gurau jer.
aku: banyak la gurau!.
adehhh

cerita 2

sekarang ni adik aku, ili aisyah, is hospitalised due to stomach problems. x-ray showed her intestine was occupied by so much feaces because she cannot deficate properly which caused her to vomit off all her food right after she'd eaten them. Just now, i received a call from my other sister, amni, who accompanied ili at the hospital, telling ili has vomitted again after several hours of being healthy. yesterday, she'd been dripped of 4 bottles... anyhow, i wish her being well again.

cerita 3

sekarang ni aku sibuk dengan satu program kesihatan yang juga mampu untuk menjana pendapatan. aku masih merangkak dan masih mencari kekuatan untuk meneruskan business ini.

ianya sejenis networking business yang memerlukan aku untuk mencari business partners dalam menjanakan profit yang tinggi. kawan aku yang introduce USANA ni kat aku sudah mendapat income +- RM2000 seminggu. wah..

tapi bukan itu yang aku kejar. aku lebih suka akan menguwar uwarkan productnya yang betul-betul hebat yang mendapat pengiktirafan no.1 dunia.
siapa yang berminat, contact aku. ohya, system perniagaan ini di jamin halal oleh badan-badan agama Amerika dan pegawai di JAKIM sendiri ada yang menyertai program ini.

apapun, aku memang sibuk.

cerita 4

kepada rakan-rakan aku yang mendirikan rumahtangga dikala cuti sekolah ini, aku mohon sejuta kemaafan kerana ketidakbolehan aku menghadirkan diri kerana jarak yang jauh dan tidak mendapat permission dari parents, apatah lagi bajet untuk ke sana. maafkan aku.

cerita 5

itu saja setakat ini. update pantas kerna mahu bersiap ke hospital. aku mungkin terpaksa membatalkan appointment aku demi ke hospital. siapa tahu rezeki ku di mana. terserah kepada tuhan, Allah yang Maha Memberi Rezeki.

Cinta ini membunuhku!

2008-11-13T08:44:00.005+08:00

aku suka sangat lagu ni. Perasaan ni macam aku pernah rasa dulu. selepas aku putus (tak kapel pun sbb masa tu baru sesi nk upgrade relationship dari kawan kepada special sikit, ale2 jd lawan, whahaha!). in fact, aku tak pernah pun kapel. stakat teman tapi mesra je. tak nak ah kapel, aku tak percaya pada diri sendiri. keh keh keh

aku tak pernah rasa se-serius ini dengan sape2 pun. huhu.. masih mencari dan menunggu mR.right.

bukan aku mahu sangat pun to be in a serius relationship, tapi mak, ayah, adik2, sedara2, maksedara2, kawan2 mak .. adehh senang cite, sume org lah di sekeliling aku tanya bila nak bawak balik, buat kenduri and all. adehh

pernah sekali, adik aku yang laki (muda setahun dr aku) tanya:

"ca, bila nak bawak balik abe ngoh nye??"
"hah?, bile kite ada abe ngoh? sape?" [blurr, sbb dia tanya out of blue]
"alaa... abe ngoh laa"
"adehh.. sabar la.. bakpo? nok main bola skali ko?"
"hehe.. bukey, nok main badminton, nok smash atah dai(atas dahi)"

erk!
whahaha.. adehh laa.. sabar la ye sume, aku ni blaja pun belum habes.. ade satu sem je lagi.. blaja pun lama sungguh, 6 years, kuar SPM trus masuk course ni, nasib baik ada scholarship gov, senang hati sikit. apa tak nye, 6 tahun beb.. kawan aku yang amik medic da jd docter da pun. whuhuhuuh

okeh. berbalik pada topic cintan, aku dengar lagu ni, rasa rindu pulak pada kepedihan Cinta. sesungguhnya, ia adalah satu nikmat.huhu. ya lah. life is full of suprises; be it kebahagiaan or kepedihan. they're all nikmat of how well we handle it. i'm sure we'll learn a lot from those experiences.

ape pun.. layann... kalo nk karaoke, ni ade skali lirik! ^-^

D'Masiv
Cinta Ini Membunuhku

kau membuat ku berantakan
kau membuat ku tak karuan
kau membuat ku tak berdaya
kau menolakku acuhkan diriku

bagaimana caranya untuk
meruntuhkan kerasnya hatimu
ku sadari ku tak sempurna
ku tak seperti yang kau inginkan

reff:
kau hancurkan aku dengan sikapmu
tak sadarkah kau telah menyakitiku
lelah hati ini meyakinkanmu
cinta ini membunuhku

bagaimana caranya untuk
meruntuhkan kerasnya hatimu
ku sadari ku tak sempurna
ku tak seperti yang kau inginkan

repeat reff

p/s: update pantas sebelum mandi ni pagi yang sejuk ni.. wahhh best nye hujan gini! hehe

tiada tajuk

2008-11-05T07:18:00.008+08:00

kerna tiada entry

whahaha..
saya nakkk sangat update my blog, tapi tidak ada tulisan/hujah yang mampu saya sampaikan pada dunia. huhu

ni mungkin penangan semalam dah last paper untuk sem 1 year 4 saya ini [malas yang teramat!]. uhh.. 1 more sem to go! dan insyaAllah, saya jadi cikgu praktikum sejurus menamatkan final exam next sem! huhu ^-^

da lama tak jadi cikgu. dulu, masa 2nd year, cuti panjang, saya bekerja sebagai cikgu sandaran-tak-berapa-terlatih di salah sebuah sekolah agama swasta di kampung saya. huhu.. kampung saya adalah sebuah kampung yang bandar.. i loikkkee!! ngeeee

ok, cerita pasal masa kat sekolah ni, saya rasa happy sangat mengajar.. tapi selalu masalah dengan admin. menciiii !! hurm, best kan kalo tak payah nak deal banyak dengan admin. adehh...

apa pun, ajar budak budak sekolah rendah sangatlah seronok [walaupun kadang2, tiba2 rasa tak seronok langsung! wOha!] ada satu masa tu, oleh kerana condition kelas tu yang crowded, saya tak sempat nak control kelas [dan saya masih baru!].. melihatkan ada beberapa orang murid saya yang keluar kelas sambil tergedik mahu main2 bersama rakan taulan, saya pun panggillah diorg masuk balik kelas.

"masuk, masuk saya kata!"
"ala teacher..."

dan ada 2 3 orang yang lincah, berlari2 hingga ke padang! saya dengan berani memarahi mereka dengan nada menyindir + warning benda yang hebat bakal berlaku jika tak paham arahan [nak buat macamana, ni cara mak saya tegur kitorg adik bradik..ngeee]

"haa.. pergilah keluar.. pergilah kalau berani!"

budak tu, dengan confidentnya berteriak ke dalam kelas,
"kawan kawan, cikgu suruh keluar main kat padanggggg! jOmmmm!"

sap!
zap!
"hahhhh??!!"

aku terus terkesima akibat mengeluaran beramai2 kawan2 mereka daripada kelas tu. maka, aku yang masa tu bertudung labuh [note: jadi teacher kat skolah rendah agama], terpaksalah berlari sambil cover line memanggil puak2 khianat itu untuk masuk balik dlm kelas!

fuhhh!! penat wei. kenapa la diorg tak kasi aku subject PJ je?? mane taknya, berkejaran di tengah padang di kala matahari tegak di benak kepala dengan kanak2 riang seperti mrk! terasa muda pulak [dan aku memang masih muda].. wOha!

haha. teringat balik itu semua, aku boleh gelak sorang2. tapi taklah sampai berdekah2 seperti selepas baca entry dan komen2 di blog Sifu Yoshz dan Mr.Jime! whohoho

apa pun, hari ni.. aku pikir nak kemas rumah sebab malam ni InsyaAllah balik kampung. Semalam gi beli tiket kat Melaka Sentral sebaik habis je my Last Paper this sem!! yey!

nota kaki: budak2 tu darjah 3, dan itu kelas sume laki! adehh.. pernah baju kurungku terkoyak sebab meja mereka diadakan paku yang tak jelas fungsinya! adehh..

nota tangan: aku tergerak nak tulis pasal cikgu yang tiada tajuk ni sebab kagum dengan cikgu Padelkopak!

huhu ^-^

kenalilah akoo dan kamoo..

2008-11-01T07:23:00.010+08:00

You will never do anything in this world without courage. It is the greatest quality of the mind next to honor.
Aristotle

Seeing what the saying says.. hurm.. for me, to get the courage to do something risky and extraordinary needs a lot of thinking and strategy. so that we'll not be falling apart. everything has to have back up plans. It's all about how much you understand your ability is.. and how much you want to push yourselves to the limit.

I love challenges as at the end of the day, I find myself learning something about me, how much am I able to do things, to handle thing [my self-efficacy] ...

As Albert Bandura puts it, "The most effective way of creating a strong sense of efficacy is through mastery experiences. Successes build a robust belief in one's personal efficacy. Failures undermine it, especially if failures occur before a sense of efficacy is firmly established."

And how much I can sustain and remain motivated to conduct things through self-regulation and self-control.. as Wikipedia.com puts it as "many processes individuals use to manage drives and emotions. Therefore, self regulation also embodies the concept of will power".

hurm..

Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get.
Dale Carnegie

yeah. I want to feel that too. I remembered winning GOLD medal for Sparring and Pattern Routines during my Taekwondo years back in school and also when I served as Programme Manager handling Tesl Community Weekend comprising ALL TESLians from Universities around Malaysia, I'm ecstatic! I'm beyond happy although thru the times, mostly I had to endure the pain but in the end, it pays a LOT. i'm not talking about money here, but more to the satisfaction that I CAN DO IT! I'm thrilled even to think about it! :D

and this Winston Churchill continues to convince me that,

A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.
Winston Churchill

you have to be optimist in whatever you're doing. hurm.. sometimes, a little of pessimistic is necessary to keep the thinking going for the plan B, if in case. It's not like we're wanting and waiting for the failure but just to keep our conscious thinking regulates, and make us realise to be in state of realistic and NOT too much of idealistic.

and then, Picasso added,

Everything you can imagine is real.
Pablo Picasso

erk! Hurm.. memang la. We need to think forward so that we did not stuck in a comfort zone for too long, because it may result to the scenarios of laying back, doing nothing, just like what some teachers do [from what i heard].. they are lacking in imagination, imagination to teach their students better, understanding students mischieves and realising their potentials.

An investment in knowledge always pays the best interest.
Benjamin Franklin

sebab cikgu or the knowledge transmitter never realise that what Franklin says is true and that's very unfortunate.. :(

not all teachers are like that and for STUDENTS who failed to perform their roles as a STUDENT, mureed who WANT to learn, also lacking in imagination, of HAVING DREAMS to become better, they dont even recognise their own potentials, how others could? hurm...

as this fella says,

We are born weak, we need strength; helpless, we need aid; foolish, we need reason. All that we lack at birth, all that we need when we come to man’s estate, is the gift of education
Jean-Jacques Rousseau

YES! Education! Because education gives human wisdom, paradigms to look upon. and thru education, human can realise their own potentials and work towards it. Sebenarnya, susah nak sedar yang kita punya harapan yang lebih baik nun in the future, because we're too scared of failure. It's better we stay put rather than try something new and these scenarios i see a LOT in Malays including me.. the very me. BUT, the drive to enjoy things differently come about through a societal layer called FRIENDS, PEER.. COMRADES, COLLEAGUES and other various names but carry one and only role, as HUMAN's COMPANY..

They brings out a different us in us. when we're with friends, we acted BOLDLY and sometimes STUPID or baka as japanese puts it, but we didnt afraid to fail because we know we have the support we need. we gain the courage and trust and keep ourselves regulated healthy enough as we are capable of REALISING our own POTENTIALS.

as this famous Muslim philospher puts it,

Manusia yang paling lemah ialah yang tidak sanggup mencari teman dan yang paling lemah daripada itu ialah yang mensia-siakan teman yang telah diperolehinya.
Imam Al-Ghazali

BETUL! manusia memerlukan various kinds of social layers so that they can accumulate their potentials from different angels. we have to make full use of our friends, [note: it's not like taking for granted] as human is developed best true mastery experiences. friends is different from family. we do NEED them both in order to develop better and move to another step, level of life, by trying something new.

but in order to become BETTER person, we need to appreciate them and play also a ROLE of a good and trusted friends for their benefits of becoming a better person too. GIVE and TAKE, that what friends are about. we have to be sincere and put trust as the MOTTO for the friendship. idealistic, aite?

hurm, reality is, terrrrrrrrrlalu ramai kawan makan kawan. kenapakah? that's what i said earlier, TRUST. To generate trust takes time, but it worth it! serious! we all, obviously hated betrayal, aite? as well as stab in the back etc.

Tuhan Maha Adil dan Maha Mengetahui. itu semua ujian and petunjuk dariNya to make us STRONGER to the challenges and hurdles ahead. percaya atau tidak, manusia memang akan belajar melalui kesilapan. tak kiralah the hard way ke soft and smoothe way or anything, yang penting, manusia mempunyai daya pemikiran kritis yang developed resistance "alah bisa tegal biasa" and pemikiran kreatif to come out with strategies to steer the wheel of life out of the tsunami..

as what this man says,

Develop success from failures. Discouragement and failure are two of the surest stepping stones to success.
Dale Carnegie

so, kawan2.. let's make a difference!
[or even differences maybe??]

we have our own potentials
jangan sia-siakan hidup

semoga kita di hisab di Padang Mahsyar kelak
sebagai Mukmin yang sejati
mukmin yang fully utilise what GOD has given you
your unique talents,
your true ability

make full use of it..
kerana ALLAH
dan
ketahuilah kawan2,
ALLAH gives that to you,
for/with reasons..
the most obvious one is
because He LOVEs you..
so, try to appreciate the Love He gave
by loving Him back..
by utilising it for the benefit of yourselves and others
try to look for His Love in Your Soul,
it's called The Light

So, make it Brighter, my friend!
^-^

Letter to the heart...

2008-10-27T11:45:00.006+08:00

Dear Miss Nisa,

Sila Study.
Jangan Pikir Panjang~~
Just Study + Doa ...

Be Strong,
I know you can!

Dearest,

Mr.Nine

I HAVE TRUST IN YOU
so,
YOU MUST BELIEVE IN YOURSELF

******************************

hurm,
ok x untuk motivasi diri aku ni??
esok first paper..
hurm
i MUST Believe in MYSELF..
Ya ALLAH, gimme the strength and drive..
to steer my study + life wisely

Permudahkanlah untuk hambaMu ini
Ya ALLAH, Maha Besar lagi Maha Mengetahui
^-^
=-------------------------------------------=

p/s: Mr.Nine is a product of mind-made.. whaha

masih mencari identity??

2008-10-25T12:35:00.002+08:00

[exam mode]

aku masih mencari identiti. mencari sebab aku belajar. aku seakan2 lupa, pada motivasi yang pernah aku ada sebelum ini. ntah mengapa, diriku terasa tergapai2 di awangan..terlalu berkecamuk, terlalu berserabut..

aku perlu kepada ketenangan, ketenangan utk memberi aku masa untuk berfikir. isk. pabila mendapat ketenangan, aku terus tidur. ape daa.. hurm.. mungkin bukan ketenangan itu [suasana hening, diam and sunyi] yang aku perlukan. ketenangan hati. hati ini sentiasa hiba. ntah mengapa. sentiasa berusaha mencari tumpuan. tapi payah. kawan-kawan? masing-masing sibuk dengan masalah sendiri. ntah. mereka seolah menjauhkan diri [owh, jgnlah aku pikir negatifff]. tidak. mereka tidak mengelak, tapi tak nampak kegusaran jiwa aku melodak kembali. waduhh..

takpe. lupakan apa yang menyakitkan.

teruskan dengan usaha ku untuk memotivasikan diri. hurm. motivasi diri?? ade ke? hurm..
aku da lupa.. yang apa yang memotivate aku dulu ialah "semuanya kerana ALLAH dan untuk MakAyah aku"

as simple as that. tapi sekarang, rational aku menikam-nikam dari belakang bertalu talu.. menghalang my ketenangan untuk mengecapi keindahan MOTIVASI aku itu. kenapakah? hilang nilai murni dalam diri? atau terkesan dengan suasana yang agak sukar di bumi Melaka ini? apakah?

mudahnya aku goyah dengan kelemahan aku. mudahnya aku dipesongkan dr dunia ILMU. aku lupa, dulu aku amat suka pada ILMU Allah, dan sekarang? aku alpa nestapa. ntah kenapa. mungkinkah kerana aku DIAM? dulu aku hidup di kelilingi kawan-kawan pengubat duka, penghias tawa. tapi sekarang? aku hidup di dunia aku. dunia maya bergelar blogger. [tak pashal-pashal blogger dipersalahkan, da xde sgt ke subject yg nk di attack?]

erk! bukan itu maksud aku. aku maksudkan.. betapa lemahnya motivasi diri ini..
aku tidak nampak pengorbanan mak ayah untuk aku teruskan belajar bersungguh-sungguh. kenapakah?

aku pun mula mencari.. mengetik-ngetik mouse and keyboard. mencari mood. dan aku ketemuan. ku saksikan. ku berlinangan. ku menangis. aku tengok iklan petronas. untuk deepavali 2008 kat sini.

sedih. teringat mak ayah. Ya ALLAH, pinjamkanlah aku ilmu Mu, Ya Allah. berkatilah aku. aku mahu belajar. Maaaaaakkk Ayyaaahhhhh....

balikkkkk

2008-10-22T23:06:00.004+08:00

petang. lepas kelas.dalam bilik.
i was busy with phone calls [to and from my mom], and
YM-ing in search for confirmation bias of my wishful thinking.

it's not like a true wishful thinking but rather, thinking of going back to KB on that very moment, thinking to take a bus that night, so that i can reach home by that morning.. aduhh.. for the weekend!

hehe. I want to spend my weekend at home..erk! can it be so? hurmm..
i looked around, i see all my housemates were asleep.. so surely i cannot asked them what they think the best for ME! haha. i always had this problem, i cannot decide for myself, not after gathering enough evident and information that satisfy both, my rational and emotional sides.

that day, emotional runs high but rationality tried to keep up and up!!

"ehh.. mane blh balik.. tak worth balik.. abis kan duit je.. da la tiket surcharge xturun2, lgpun balik wikend je wei. sampai pagi sabtu, ahad malam da nk gerak balik MLK"

hurm.. then a YM pop-up showed that my dear ex-rumate back in UIA online! waaahh.. yey! i can ask for her opinions then! [opinion ke?? i think its more to confirmation bias]
so she responded as the way i want her to..

"ko ni mcm tatau je kite. kalo da rs nk blk, blk je weii. xyah pk panjang"
"owh.. eh? kalo mcm tu, jap, aku g tgk tiket"

not long after that,

"Jun, akoo da dpt tiket, blk mlm ni. ko xblk ke??"
"akoo? takpe, akoo da OK lps ckp fon ngn my mum td"
"owh.ok. akoo siap dulu ye"

then, i called syazzy, hantarkan ke Melaka Central. from there, i took trans bus .. reach KB at 540am.

my mom and others from Matrix UIA Nilai Campus reached home at about 8am. huhu.. i managed to see those faces i left for about 2 weeks, rite on raya the 5th.. huhu

so much so, all my family members gathered at home, including my big bro, oni-chan, who lived in pasiag gudang leaving his wife at work. huhu ^-^ he went back home to help my sister, Anis, to move out from Matrix Campus after finishing 1 and 1/2 year there.

akoo suke..... all 10 of us got back together. altho for a short time :D
hurm.. the next day, we went to Hospital Jerteh. my mom was really... really concerned about his younger and only brother, who was diagnosed for cancer earlier this year. so i quickly finished my assignment and soon, after taking our breakfast, we all rush there.

seeing my uncle in that condition, make my heart sink into emotion. a month before, i saw him recovering.. and at that moment, he stayed in my house. for a month, i can hear him jokes around, promising this and that if he ever gets better, i still can see his smiles and hear his giggles and guffaws.

we really had a good time when he was in my house, altho he was on the bed, lying and sometimes sit straight... i love when he sees future better.. back then. i still remember his words of becoming better person if he is cured. you are the best! that's why you cant be better! you are the best!

i love your jokes, you brightened up our day altho u're fighting those cancerious demons!

when we got to the hospital, he was like living in his own world already. he lost lots of his hair. since wednesday [and that's was 4 days before], his drip hasnt been stopped due to dehydration. owh. my beloved ayohngoh.

and yesterday..the sad news reached me. he was at the edge of his life. and later that evening, he passed away. innalillahiwainnaillahiraji'un. alfatihah.

i was shocked cuz the image of a month before keep emerging in my mind. he said with strong will.. that he's going to walk again. he said.. he want to be better. he said... he'll do whatever it takes to get better. but, Allah's calls is greater. at least, he had fight for his life. at least, he had the will to changed for the better.

p/s: i hope everyone around learn from him. no matter how ugly this life for you, remember to strive for the best!

i remembered when he started from scratch of having his own rubber estate. it was when i first entered the matriculation college in Kuala Pilah. he is happy, living in a very neat mediocre life. altho he works as policeman, that doesnt stop him from indulging in his unique hobby, RUBBER TAPPING..

i consider this as a unique one because many did this job out of searching for money, not because they liked it. hurm.. then, after he found the trees near the area of his house in Johol, he tried consulting Chinese guys or any other tokey who do not know how to organised their estates. so, he started to tapped for them. after that, he managed to get to buy [i think] those estates. now, arwah owns his own workers who worked for him... for his hobby .. best kan?

my late uncle also is a very generous person. he doesnt know how to upset people. he was so kind to us and he loves and respects my mom and my dad soooo muchh.. i love him for the love he held to my family. i love you uncle.

i hope u'll be between orang2 yang beriman dan bertaqwa kpd ALLAH. semoga jasadmu di jauhi seksa kubur. sesungguhnya, kehadiran mu sungguh bermakna. semoga berjumpa di syurga nanti. InsyaALLAH.

p/s: smoga keluarganya tabah menghadapi kehilangan mu. dan belajar untuk menginsafi diri. kerana kita bukan hidup untuk selamanya. dan kerana kita hidup untuk Allah S.W.T.

ingatlah, dunia ini adalah tempat menanam dan menuai ibadah.sesungguhnya, hasilnya akan dihitung di akhirat kelak kerana akhiratlah dunia yg sebenar Allah janjikan untuk kita. semoga kita saling ingat mengingati.

"semoga arwah pakcikku dan kita semua tergolong dikalangan ahli syurga-Mu, Ya Allah". Amin.

gaya, mutu, keunggulan ...

2008-10-15T18:29:00.001+08:00

ini adik aku

aku bukan nak cerita pasal adik aku
tapi tentang gaya nya yang ala-ala mentadak tu..
entah kenapa..
mungkin dia rasa comeyy
amad ni selalu post camtuh
katanya
bukan mentadak
tapi TURTLE

manyak la turtle cenggitu

ade lagi satu gaya
yang aku dapati agak interesting

iaitu gaya melompat..
melompat ini memerlukan daya tujahan yang hebat
di samping kebolehan mem-posing-kan diri
dengan sopan tanpa memunculkan bahagian2 yang mengaibkan
ketika aktiviti sedang dijalankan.

ini kawan aku
dia baru je grad..dan itu cerita lain..

cuba tengok gaya lompatan aladdin berserta pose senyuman yakin
tidak ada mana2 model pun mampu melakukannya
dah la ini menjadi aktiviti mengisi masa
sementara membaiki kereta yang sedang rosak
di tengah2 lebuh raya..

ape daa...

dan satu lagi pose yang aku paling kagum...
ini pose outdoor pengantin selepas selesai kedua-dua mempelai
di-ijabkabul-kan.. alhamdulillah
aku sangatlah kagum..
dan ini pun kawan aku
dan itu pun cerita laen..

aku sangat kagum sampai..
aku pun harap dpt buat pose seperti ini
untuk outdoor session akoo kelak..
^-^

keb@b!an Melanda !!!

2008-10-12T12:07:00.004+08:00

chantek tak?
aku baru beli kasut ni smlm...

aku try mase kat kedai..
dan mase da blk umah
nk tunjuk kat housemate
akan kecantikan nye

aku pun pegang
pada paras mata
seakan mahu baca suhu di termometer

dan aku nampak
3 dots ala mickey mouse
3 dots yg membentuk 3 segi..

arghh... kulit ape nih??
B@B! ???

aku terus search tenet..
tanye situ sini
kawan2 YM mostly
mR.Em terus kasik link2

yang related to pigskin
then
dia suruh wat report
aku mase tu masih sedih..
jadi malas..

diepun terus mintak gambar2 yg berkaitan
utk di report di Halal Malaysia
dan Jabatan Agama Melaka
entahlahh..

kalo korang tak caya..
rujuk site ni
then tgk gambar ni
ade btol ke tak..

kalo tak nampak
zOoM .. kasik nampak

kasut2 gni berlambak di jual
kat kedai2 kasut
tanpa label
korang kene pandai belek dan tgk
jgn maen try je

p/s: jgn try ngn kaki basah sudahh..
jenuh la samakk
hoho

" i've learnt my lesson, the hard way "

p/s: mmg tanggungjawab kte sume report bende2 nih..
terang2 bende ni HARAM!

Kosong dan Wenk~

2008-10-08T17:35:00.002+08:00

Pernah tak kau rasa…

Yang kau tidak rasa apa apa?

Yang kau hilang arah dan tujuan hidup?

Tiba tiba, kau tidak fahami apa yang berlaku kepada diri kau?

Berkali kali meminta pedoman dan cinta dari yang Agung

Kerana engkau hilang nikmat kehidupan?

Yang engkau tidak tahu apa yang hendak dirasai

Engkau tidak rasa gembira..

Tidak rasa sedih

Tidak rasa resah mahu pun sakit

Hidup kau jadi seperti kayu

Begitu monotonous… begitu lurus di mana

Tiada apa yang hadir

Yang boleh mencabar diri

Kau seolah olah di awangan

Seorang diri.. . tergapai gapai

Mencari maksud and tujuan hidup

Kau sedar kau ada keluarga, kawan kawan, handphone, computer dan binatang peliharaan..

Tapi

Kau masih mencari.. dan belum mendapat kepastian

Adakah engkau penting dalam hidup mereka…

Engkau penat memikirkan..

Apa yang bakal terjadi sekiranya kau tiada lagi di bumi ini.

Tidaakkk

Engkau tidak mampu untuk mati

Bukan tak bersedia.. tapi takut amal tak cukup

Ya lah. Dosa sentiasa melebihi pahala.

Begitu kerdil insan ini yang bernama engkau

Engkau juga tidak mampu untuk mati…

Kerana engkau mahu membalas jasa kedua ibu bapa kau

Bukannya dapat betul betul balas

Tapi sekurang-kurangnya,

Dapat rasa hasil titik peluh sendiri memerah keringat di pagi hari mencari secebis rezeki yang halal

Adakah aku terlalu matre? Terlalu materialistic yang suka akan nikmat dunia berbanding akhirat?

yang sudah tentu lebih kekal daripada dunia yang sekejap saja?

Adakah ini yang menyebabkan aku hilang nikmat hidup?

Kerana menjadikan duit sebagai tujuan hidup?

Jikalau begitu Ya ALLAH..

Bawalah aku ke jalan yang benar

Izinkanlah memohon taubat.. terimalah taubat aku

Kembalikan nikmat hidup aku…

Dan wujudkanlah cinta abadi dalam hati ini

Cinta kepad Mu Ya ALLAH

Kerana seolah olah.. hati ini amatlah tawar

Dengan kemanisan dan kepahitan Cinta

Bukan ku doa untuk kemudaratan, tapi Cinta Mu sungguh Indah khabarnya

Berilah aku peluang merasainya

Ya ALLAH

Tolong lah.

Bantulah hamba Mu ini.

Jauhi aku, keluargaku, guru guru dan sahabat2 aku dari kekufuran dan kefasikan.

20 jam jem dr KB ke MLK!

2008-10-08T12:33:00.015+08:00

jem di tengah2 hutan!

jem.. menciii

aku tak mo cakap banyak
sebab sume org da sedia maklum
yang kat kelantan jem gle2
macam ade wat megasale
mase cuti raya hari tu

oleh kerana kitorg ni org baik2,
maka kitorg tidak mengamalkan
potong2 line..

oleh itu, kitorg semestinya
tidak dikutuk dan disumpah seranah
oleh pengguna jalan raya yang laen
walaupun penat
kerana perjalanan KB - MLK
mengambil masa 20jam
bertolak dalam pukul 8pagi
sampai melaka kul 4pagi

ini sebab jem bermula dari
Machang ke Gombak
Machang> Kuala Krai> Gua Musang> Merapoh>
Raub> Bentong dan seterusnya Karak pun Jem!
arghh

kat gua musang.. aish..

bayangkan masa duk kat machang
7 Km mengambil masa 50 minit
bayangkan
ke-krem-an kaki mR.Em menekan clutch
haha
katanya kaki krem sket je
tapi
kapla krem byk

mau tak nye
masa duk kat tol Bentong
da lps solat jama' taakhir maghrib isya
so da malam

lampu2 brek yang merah menyala
menyilau2 kat mata kami
Jo memang xblh thn
terus krohh krohh

aku masih bertahan memberi komen
menyedapkan hati mR.Em
memberi semangat
sambil mengutuk2 kete yang ade sampai 7 lampu merah kat blkg
kete ke lori??
xigt kete ape, tapi adik bradik CAMRY

mencii
sampai encik eM terpaksa menyelinap ke lane sebelah
demi mengelak mata di makan lampu merah
yang memeningkan

tapi kami syukur kami selamat
dari nahas jalanraya
dan dari jampi serapah orang laen
semoga kita semua byk2 bersabar
kerana akan ada hikmah disebalik apa yang berlaku

dan
kepada pesalah2 jalanraya
ingatan ye
bukan semua hari indah
ingat jugak
orang laen pun nak cepat
orang laen pun kena ligat
orang laen pun nak buang hajat
hahaha

ape ni double line niii... isk! @%^$^*&)*#

arghhh @@%$657*1@%^6

hoho..
geram jugak la

dah la jem sepanjang jalan
setiap pit stops tu..
toilet da jadi makin teruk
sebab sume org guna
rank toilet aku dan Jo buleh kasi
for this time around
is
1/10

terukkan
euwww
kotor sgt
tolonglah..
jangan la salah guna
pikir orang laen jugak

yang paling tak tahan
ade kesan saki baki muntah dan tuala wanita yang menjijikkan
yuckkk!!

ape pun
best la trip kali ni..
dapat dengar mr.Em buat gelak jahat ala2 emoticon dalam YM tu
hebakk la
sejibik! hahahaha

best sangat jugak
sebab Jo da bawak bekal roti butter home-made
panas dan segar dari oven
wah wah
feveret mR.Em ek eh?
hoho :D

ape pun
alhamdulillah
sampai jugak ke Melaka

sampai kul 4 pagi tu.. terus terbongkang..
hahaha
sempat jugak g kelas kul 730 pagi tu

hoho~

aku masih ber-mood raya!

2008-10-08T01:28:00.005+08:00

Black Bottom Cupcakes

Bahan A

1 paket cream cheese, softened

Sebiji telur

1/3 cawan gula

1/8 sudu kecil garam

1 cawan coklat chips kurang manis

Bahan B

1 ½ cawan tepung serbaguna

¼ cawan serbuk koko

1 sudu kecil baking soda

½ sudu kecil garam

1/3 cawan minyak sayur

1 sudu kecil cider vinegar

1 sudu kecil esen vanilla

Cara-cara

Panaskan oven kepada 175 Celcius. Susunkan mangkuk/cawan muffin.
Pukul cream cheese, telur, gula dan garam (dalam bahan A) sehingga ringan dan kembang. Kacaukan bersama coklat cip . simpankan.
Kemudian, sebatikan tepung, gula, serbuk koko, baking soda and garam (dalam bahan B). buatkan bulatan di tengah, kemudian masukkan air, minyak sayur, vinegar and esen vanilla. Kacau sehingga betul-betul sebati.
Masukkan Bahan B ke dalam cawan besi muffin yang dilapik kertas itu sehinggga 1/3 penuh, kemudian diletakkan campuran cream cheese( bahan A) disebelah atas muffin.
Bakar selama 25 hingga 30 minit.

Jumlah untuk 24 biji muffin.

Selamat mencuba! ^-^

p/s: kalo xpaham, sila rujuk di sini.

bodoh ke?!

2008-09-23T22:45:00.007+08:00

ni sbb aku buat prangai sekali lagi..
di mana aku malas nak pikir idea baru utk diketengahkan,
aku kopi + pes ape yg aku tulis in response kat blog Jawapan Cinta
dlm entrinya yang membincangkan perihal...

"mengenengahkan hujah kpd org bodoh itu mudah,
namun sukar untuk membuat dirinya mengakui akan kebenarannya"

dan dlm bahasa arab, perkataan 'jahil' itu membawa maksud 'bodoh'
dalam bahasa melayu.
dan begitulah lebih kurang...

hurm..
sesungguhnya nk cr org bodoh itu adalah sukar..

sbb manusia ade akal. cuma tak mahu guna. bodoh itu terlalu subjective.

org tak mahu trima sbb mrk tak mahu pikir ataupun mrk dlm kejahilan di mana mereka memilih utk tidak terlibat dlm melakukan sebarang benda2 yg poyo (kebaikan)

sampai ada yg takut nk buat yg benar, sampai ada yang takut nk even menderma.. hahah. manusia

mengikut kajian kes, cikgu2 tak boleh / dilarang sama skali utk cakap murid2 seorang yang bodoh. sbb budak2 tu ada potensi masing2.

sesunggunya bodoh tu tak wujud jika masyarakat blaja untuk berfikir. dan bila berfikir, manusia akan jadi kritikal dan kreatif secara tak langsung.
sy suka kata2 tu, tp jahil adalah tak sama dgn bodoh. huhu. sy rs lah. sbb jahil ni lebih bersifat tidak tahu walhal bodoh lebih bersifat tidak tahu nak fikir macamana (more prone to dungu) huhu

jadi, cane nk buat org jahil mengakui kebenaran, ialah dgn membuatnya berfikir. salah satu cara ialah dengan mengenengahkan hujah terbabit secara istiqamah (berterusan) dan yang paling penting, dgn cara berhikmah... serta penampilan dan pembawakan org yg mengenengahkan hujah itu juga haruslah dijaga [role model].. barulah dia MAHU berfikir.

dan yang paling tak suka bila diorg ckp, "tak dapat hidayah lagi" .. ini adalah jawapan sangat TAK BETUL dan ini cerita lain..
dan yang paling penting, cikgu2 tak boleh anggap murid2/pelajar2 nya bodoh sbb setiap manusia ni unik. ada potensi tersendiri. tugas cikgu ialah meng'arah'kan (directing) potensi terbabit kepada kebenaran smoga tidak disalahguna di samping mengasah bakat2 mereka kerana mereka bukan bodoh tapi mereka

"tak tahu yang mereka tak tahu"

dan di sini, sy ingin berterima kasih kepada sofwah
kerana menyedarkan sy bahawa perkataan 'murid'
dalam bahasa melayu adalah adaptasi perkataan 'mureed' [rootword: uridu]
dalam bhs arab yg membawa maksud 'yang berkehendak'...

wahh.. rase enlightened!

Okeh. maaf kalau lari context.
salam. Ramadhan Kareem. \(^v^)/

p/s: bodoh sombong=tak mahu tahu yang mereka tak tahu sebab mereka buat-buat tahu dan prasan tahu. hoho :D

get married? seriusly?

2008-09-22T23:50:00.004+08:00

last night, i chatted with my e-friend through YM.

this friend is a he.
He said that it's good for me to become a teacher.
i agreed but changed the statement to :

it's good for me to get married! :D

haha. he said "aihh.. gatal nk kawen, da ade calon ke??"

well, confidently I said, NOPE!
what the..?? how can i get married if no one to get married with? hurm.. this is serius! hahaha

then he said, "better asks your mom to find one for you"
then i replied, " i already asked, but she said...aihh, sape nk kawen ni?? awk ke sy?"
haha

i added that my mom was the one who keep asking me whether i already have the partner-in-my-life-to-be or not. well, sarcastically i replied "aihh.. sape nk kawen ni?? mak ke sy?! hahaha

LOL. :D

he said my mom is "sempoi".. haha..
like daughter like mother..erk!
huhu ^-^

there will be times; things happened when we least expect it. so, always be ready!
u'll never know u'll receive an invitation to my wedding! sooner or later, i leave it to Allah.
Yaqin with His mercy, Ukhuwah Fillah!

\(^-^)/

penangan tak sahur!

2008-09-22T05:59:00.005+08:00

treet. treet.

"Tolong kejutkan beta sahur ye.. tq.. hikhik hik" 2.38 pg 22ramadan. ni msg dr adik aku yg prasan nak bermanja2 dgn aku, si kakak yang chantek manis. hehe [prashan!!]

henset ku yg paling klasik iaitu 3310i ku setkan alarm 430pg, confident blh bangun
sebab bunyinye amatlah kuat, dan ku lelapkan mata pukul 3.04pg slps memakai stokin
akibat trauma kesejukan melampau mengelak semput dan selsema.

aku xlena sgt tdo sbb asyik duk mimpi pasal esemen 'lesson plan' yg mana antara penyebab aku tdo lewat, di samping aktiviti bermain cakap2 ayam berak kapur dengan rakan2 seluruh alam.

tiba taba aku sedar, bunyi bising anak2 rumah sebelah duk main ngn kucing, aku bingkas dari tempat tidurku. aku tengok jam pc aku yg masih menyala, 5.45pg. wah! menarik gle sbb aku tak sahur!! menarik ke hape?!!

pelik.. nape jam henfon aku yg canggih tu xbunyi?? aku check.. dan check.. mata terkebil2 cuba digest kul bpe mse tu. huh??! kul 1750? ape kes?? sape yg set jam aku nihh... aduhh [cuba salahkan org laen la pulak!] hahaha

perkara pertama aku terpikir, isk, taknak jadik macam Yahudi. amalan pose diorg ialah tak sahur dan berbuka di lewat2kan. isk. taknakkk [aksi mcm iklan taknak isap rokok yg patah tu]

longlai seharian kalo xmandi nih. trus aku g mandi dan sempat meminta doa diberikan kekuatan.. hurm. okla kot puasa hari ni. xde la LARA sgt sbb ..penat, longlai. hihi

hehe.. sempat je aku g jalan2 kat kedai buku Dewan Bahasa dan Pustaka kat Taman Chempaka dekat ngn Tesco Melaka.. beli buku "Di Atas Sajadah Cinta" hasil karya Habiburrahman El Shirazy, novelist yg tulis cte "Ayat-ayat Cinta".. hehe

isk. ble pulak aku nk baca buku ni?
Cte "Sabriel" karya Garth Nix pun tak abes2 lagikk.. aduhh

huhu slmt buka! [entry santai utk tubuh yg longlai]... ^-^

p/s: tenkiu encik Wiki sbb bagi sy hyperlink-kan. hehe

<< InDAh >>

life is like a dream...

I'am afraid of my dreams

need to move

sickness is good though..

complete me

I miss Mr.Em..

The proposal and 17 again

adik ku kawen ngan kawan aku?? aku pulak??

running away ..

wow! 101 already?

batik

hari sukaneka SK Laloh..

ahhhh!

mati itu pasti.. kubur macamane?

Pictures tell it all ~

depression.. memakan diri

My Valedictory Speech, IIUM 25th Convocation

ini cerita amad ^__^

it is a charm, i bet. ^-^

aku mimpi lagi..

dear love..

TESLians' Convo - Topic 1

sudah lama tidak update

ahhh.. hati ku remuk!

aku di SK Laloh, Kuala Krai

sedikit update..

my best buffday wishes...

rumah di perantauan..

..:: introducing.. my lovely students... hihi ::..

hepi buffday to kiera ~~

kan best...

hadiah seyy *updated*

trip to Quantan.. pengubat hati..

.:: Laskar Pelangi ::.

aku 23 tahun 365 hari..

guruku tersayang..terima kasihku..

early practicum...

bergambar di saat akhir di serindit

we did it!!

we're struggling... short 2009 planner...

reflection letter.. (on request by fellow friends)

malas..

sedikit tentang amad...

kurosagi.. kamu hebatlah!

Meet Bung Shinoda 2

still not asleep (masih tidak tdo!)

Momo The Prince is Not That Bad

Eel + Deeeelicious :p

unique is NOT straight!

Munajat Cinta ?!! .. hmmm

visual art class for teacher to be!

Homework, I Love You

Let me share me LOVE!!

Let's bake a cake!

bubbling as usual..

fever and all..

laugh all that you want!

someone..somewhere..

doa untuk ayah...

ada soalan..

kisah cuti...

i'm not DAT stupid (aku bukan budak kecik!)

eidul adha di Kota Bharu...

kerap kali...

Cinta ini membunuhku!

tiada tajuk

kenalilah akoo dan kamoo..

Letter to the heart...

masih mencari identity??

balikkkkk

gaya, mutu, keunggulan ...

keb@b!an Melanda !!!

Kosong dan Wenk~

20 jam jem dr KB ke MLK!

aku masih ber-mood raya!

bodoh ke?!

get married? seriusly?

penangan tak sahur!

hadiah seyy updated